The story I find myself in.....

Marinating in the furious longing of God

2010-03-15T15:48:00.000-07:00

Recently I've been reading Brennan Manning's "The Furious Longing of God".

Furious Longing

The title intrigued me. The little jacket info about Mr. Manning was intriguing - recovering alcoholic, former priest, lived in cave, ministered to shrimpers....

So I read this short intriguing book and I found it.....hard to engage with. I liked it well enough. I enjoyed the language - Mr. Manning uses language that tends to leave me feeling raw and exposed - in a good way. But the general theme - God loves me - was what got in the way. As I was reading I was thinking - yeah, yeah....I get that God loves me. What else is there in this little book that I can wrestle with? And so I was underwhelmed.....but some of it stuck.

In his book Mr. Manning encourages the reader - through stories of his own experiences - to marinate in some verses and phrases. The two that stuck with me were:

Abba, I belong to you.

I am my beloved's and His desire is for me. (Song of Solomon 7:10)

I found myself repeating those phrases over and over. Not only for myself but on behalf of others as well. They became the background prayer while I was running, doing errands, etc.

And then I re-read the book.....again.....and yet again. Today, I was in the doctor's office and had the opportunity to read it for about the 5th time in the past 6 weeks and it hit me totally different. I am the object of God's love - with no pre-condition....just as I am. I am His. He desires me....each day....upon arising He is waiting to engage with me. He is watching over me as I sleep. His love for me never rests....never settles....never runs away but rather is active, alive, pursuing.

Somehow - after marinating with these phrases, I have awakened to God's love for me in a new, fresh way. I am experiencing God's "furious longing" for me....

Thanks Mr. Manning....for being a vessel that God speaks through this day.

If anyone would like to borrow an intriguing little book let me know....

Road Race - take 2!

2010-03-09T16:52:00.000-08:00

I'm participating in the Cooper River Bridge Run at the end of this month. My brother John...specifically YOUNGER brother John....invited me to do this race together while we are down in Charleston, S.C. visiting my dad. My brothers - John and Rich (I'm the perfect middle child of course!) and I took my dad out last summer for some off-shore fishing and other general boy fun for a weekend and it was a blast. So much so we decided to do it again. It was great to connect with my brothers and create some great memories with all of us together. Here is a picture of John making sure Dad doesn't get yanked out of the boat reeling in a giant fish!

But I digress.....back to the Cooper River Bridge Run. Sort of...

The last time John and I tried to race together was about 6 years ago. We both needed a goal to lose a little weight and get in better shape. So we decided to start with a triathlon! Yeah....

After we had both registered for the race we started training. I soon discovered that I liked breathing WAY more than swimming and this led me to not competing. But I did get a very nice $40 T-shirt for my registration fee. John, meanwhile, trained very hard and went into the race with an adequate bike, a nice racing wet suit, and in decent shape. He competed....but alas took a wrong turn on the bike portion of the event and was disqualified. All in all not a very good showing for the Moss boys....

So - hopefully we will be able to do better and both compete in and finish the Bridge run. Of course, the fact that I had trouble registering on-line which caused me to actually register TWICE does not bode well. But I do now have 2 really nice $40 t-shirts....hopefully I'll actually run the race as well!

The race is a 10K - flat except for that 4th mile that is all uphill at an average 4% grade.....should be fun! I'll let you know how it goes in about 4 weeks.....

Quieted by God's love

2010-03-04T07:32:00.000-08:00

This verse has been traveling with me these days

The LORD your God is with you,

he is mighty to save.

He will take great delight in you,

he will quiet you with his love,

he will rejoice over you with singing."
Zephaniah 3:17 (NIV)

When was the last time you were quieted by God’s love?

I wish a thousand memories would flood into my brain when I ponder that question. But, if I’m honest with myself, the moments of my being quieted by God’s love are rare. And it isn’t because God’s love for me is in short supply. Zephaniah makes it very clear:

…The LORD my God is with me
…He takes great delight in me
…He rejoices over me with singing

So it must be me. It must be me not allowing myself to be quieted by God’s love. Why is that? Maybe I don’t feel like I deserve His love and it is easier to just keep moving and striving thinking I can earn His love. Maybe I’m afraid of quiet – of being alone with God so I fill my life with distractions and relationships so I look “okay” on the outside….afraid of what God might find on the inside if I pause. Maybe it’s because if I stop I might hear Him singing and that singing will start to pull me in another direction….a direction I don’t want to go.

Maybe….

But then a memory comes….of my then 5 y.o. son, Alexey, being hurt. But he doesn’t run to me for comfort. He turns away….so I run to him. Holding him I tell him “You are my child, I love you, it will be okay, you are my child, I love you, it will be okay”….over and over again. And gradually….he is quieted. I can feel him starting to “melt” into me as I hold him…no longer resisting me but now leaning into my embrace. And he is quiet. And in my heart I am rejoicing over him with singing.

God desires the same for you and I right now…..He takes great delight in you….lean into Him and allow His great love for you to quiet you…..and just see if you don’t hear Him singing – rejoicing over YOU…and then linger in that embrace….in God’s love!

May the God who takes great delight in you, break through into your strivings this day and quiet you with His love…..and may you hear Him rejoicing over you with singing!

Coincidence - I think not!

2010-02-20T05:29:00.000-08:00

I had a good friend in Illinois who could see God's connections in cool ways. One of his favorite phrases was, "Coincidence, I think not!" as he pieced together Holy Spirit happenings. That phrase has been rolling around the last few days as I have experienced a few of those moments.

I have stumbled upon Zephaniah 3:17-18 a couple of times in the past week. Weird. A book of the bible I'm pretty sure I haven't read in total, nor can I find without using the index in my bible yet there it is.....beckoning me. Here is the verse in a "mixed" translation (NIV and the message)

The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He takes great delight in you,
he quiets you with his love,
he rejoices over you with singing."

The accumulated sorrows of your exile will dissipate.
I, your God, will get rid of them for you.
You've carried those burdens long enough.

Recently, I have begun memorizing some scripture with a friend. Last week it was Col 3:15 and I thought I had picked some others that would be appropriate for the coming weeks. But - in true "coincidence, I think not" form - I believe I am to hide these words from Zeph in my heart and let them marinate and work on me. And so it goes.....

"Boring is Good!"

2009-06-11T21:07:00.001-07:00

I'm doing my second overnight volunteer stint at Simpson house tonight (You can read about my first night here). Right now I'm listening to about 40 guys sleep....complete with snoring, coughing, and some general restlessness from a few. I am praying for peace for them....

One of the shelter staff told me as she left that she hopes my evening is boring. Then she paused, looked at me and said, "Because boring is good." Yep....striving for boring is my goal for the evening.

The other background noise is in the TV room - NBA finals are blaring complete with guys cheering for their teams. It's all good....

As long as I can keep the sleeping guys asleep and the NBA guys from getting to loud. Otherwise "boring" may be lost....

The last time I volunteered was about a month ago and I was happy/sad to see some familiar faces. I recognize at least 4-5 of the guys. I don't think any of them remembered me.

When the guys were let in tonight I was surprised that about 6 of them were riding bikes, one brought in a pair of crutches attached to his bike, and another man brought in a fishing pole with him. Seeing these guys and how they value what they have is humbling.

Back to praying for peace....and for a boring evening.....Lord, send Your peace.

Awkward Questions about Jesus

2009-06-09T04:49:00.001-07:00

Man, I feel like this a lot of the time when I'm trying to talk about my faith to my own kids. (This vid is from an English sitcom entitled "Outnumbered".)

ht to Scot McKnight

Minding my P's and D's

2009-06-08T07:51:00.000-07:00

My son, Alexey is in 4th grade. His report card doesn't have the traditional letter grades yet but rather P's and D's. P = Proficient and D = Developing. I'm proud to say that generally he gets straight P's. (That just sounds wrong but I digress.)

I've been thinking of the P's and D's in my life as it relates to serving and being in a faith community with others. I'm in transition right now - having been worshipping at a new church for about 5 months. As I have reflected on that journey some I've come up with 3 P's and a D.

Planner - The previous two churches that I have served at I became quickly involved in many ministry areas. I have the gift of helps so that is a natural occurrence for me. I was involved in youth ministry, praise band, worship planning, small groups....served as elder, worked on search teams, and generally tried to jump in to help as needed. In most areas that I served I became involved in some degree of planning, leading, and directing. I discovered that I generally experienced my most times of intimate worship with God in the developing and planning process and that when an actual event occurred I was unable to worship with the community. I was too caught up in the evaluating, coordinating, hoping, praying, thinking what's next, etc.

Performer - For much of my time on Sundays over the past 10 years I have played drums in a praise band. Again...many times the most intimate worship times for me occurred during rehearsal, thinking thru music, etc. Once Sunday rolled around my thoughts were usually tied to questions like, "What's the right tempo" "Are we together" "Do we repeat the chorus" "How do we end the song". With all of that rolling around in my head it was usually very difficult for me to worship while playing - at least on Sunday mornings. Yes, I "perform and play" my best for God, but on Sunday...with the added layer of responsibility of leading others in worship my focus becomes split. (It is very cool when you do totally engage and a whole community invites the Holy Spirit to inhabit their praises...but for me those moments are the exception rather than the rule.)

Participant - Here is where I have found myself the last few months. I am not involved in any formal ministry. I have simply been a participant. It has been joyful, refreshing, and challenging. It has helped me learn again how to focus my attention on worshipping - not planning or performing. It has been a blessing to worship in community with my family and friends - to dance alongside (in my awkward ways), raise my hands, bow down, be lifted up - together. It has helped me re-discover the joy or communal worship and to see and experience just a little slice of heaven.

Desire - But now what? That is the question that is haunting me as I try and best discern where and how God wants me to serve. I have come to see some of the gifts, challenges, and dangers of my three P's. My desire is to serve God in the ways He wants me to go and become the follower, man, husband, and father that He wants me to be. I can see Him building into me in new ways, with new experiences, and new relationships.

I pretty sure I'll never get a P = proficient. Nor would I want one as that sounds like an end point. I hope I am always a D student. One who is developing and becoming more like Jesus. Yeah....I'm striving for a D!

Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

Star Wars vs. Star Trek!

2009-06-04T14:00:00.000-07:00

No wonder I like both of these movies so much....

Watch My Favorite Movie (Star Trek vs. Star Wars) on CollegeHumor

"Beauty is Pain"

2009-06-04T05:00:00.000-07:00

Saw this Yahoo vid about how "skinny jeans" are causing nerve problems in people's legs. First, this is not a problem I have to worry about (my kids have told me I look REALLY bad in skinny jeans). But in the vid a woman who appears to be representing a fashion magazine of some sort says "beauty is pain".

It makes me think back to the Dove ad campaign a while back.

I have two daughters and two sons. My prayer is that they each see themselves as "fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:14); know they were created "in the image of God" (Genesis 1:27)....and find their true identity in Christ.

Red In The Face

2009-06-03T15:00:00.000-07:00

I have a genetic pre-disposition toward skin cancer. I have gotten into the routine of having a "skin check" every 6 months. Usually that leads to a biopsy being taken, a number of small spots being burned off with liquid nitrogen, or other such fun stuff . On rare occasion it leads to a small surgery to remove an actual lesion. None of it is horrible - but most of it is uncomfortable. Of course the option of NOT taking care of those small spots as they come up really isn't an option.

Recently my doctor recommended I undergo "Photodynamic Therapy" or "Blue Light" treatment. I had my first session two days ago. It involves having your face first prepped with acetone to remove the oils on your skin. Trying to breath while someone basically washes your face with an acetone (think fingernail polish remover) soaked washcloth is nearly impossible.

Then an ointment is applied. It is a clear ointment but pretty greasy looking. It has to stay on for an hour. Of course, you can't take up a treatment room for an hour....so you go back out to the lobby with a very shiny, greasy face and try to keep your head down while reading old magazines - luckily I like Midwest Living...

After your hour is up it's time for the light therapy! I have never been in a suntan booth. But my face has been now. First you get to put on the really cool looking swim goggles to protect your eyes. (Can you keep your eyes open with those on? Will the rays penetrate at all? Just a few of the questions I had!) Then you sit on a stool, in a room cooled to a ridiculous temperature, with your face in a hot dog bun shaped fluorescent light device. Your nose is almost touching the plastic surface. "Are you comfortable?" the nurse asks....don't even get me started!

Then, while your face is immersed in this hot dog bun shaped light, they place one of those small battery operated fans in your hand. Of course, your face is in a plastic tube and you can't see your hand or how to work the fan. Then you are told that if it gets too hot you can use the fan to cool your face. Ummm....my face is surrounded by plastic - I don't know if I can even turn the fan on let alone get it to blow on my face! Grrrrr.....

Okay - time to turn on the light. It's very bright. It starts out a little warm. The nurse says, "I'll check on you in a few minutes" and leaves the room. I'm all alone. The warm moves into the "I'm being stuck with thousands of tiny needles" stage. I try the fan. I get it turned on and can't really get it to blow on me. Man it is getting hot on my face. This is NOT fun.

The nurse returns and asks how I'm doing. I take the high road and say I'm "moderately uncomfortable" rather than "my face is melting off!" She says, "that's normal...you only have 11 minutes left" and leaves the room again.

The sensations and treatment continue. It sort of surges in intensity - from hot to prickly. I think at some point I sort of zoned out because my nose touched the plastic surface of the light machine - does that mean I got too close?

It's finally over. The nurse turns off the machine. She has me wash my face - which is very red now. She says that's good and I should get a good result from the treatment. She then applies a steroid cream and sunblock. Great - Mr. Greasy face heads out into public again.

The rest of the day....and still at this moment...my face is red, feels tight, and has that really good sunburn feel to it. I'm supposed to stay out of the sun for at least 3 days. The instructions actually say "Wear a large brimmed hat when walking to your car". Wow.

Here is the picture of me that you have been waiting and reading so patiently for....

I'm thinking I may go back to having my small pre-cancerous spots burned off with the liquid nitrogen again. We'll see....

Study Break - Enlarging How I See Life

2009-06-03T05:00:00.000-07:00

I've decided to actually allow God's word to impact me - hopefully daily...but at least more regularly. To help me follow through with that I thought I'd post some thoughts here on the passage I'm reading. Feel free to comment and share how the passage impacts and/or speaks to you - and please know that I have no formal training in this. I'm just asking God's spirit to speak to me and allow me to see more through His eyes and heart than mine. (For me, this is also part of responding to Tony Myles' challenge for the summer.)

The Passage - 1 Cor 1:1-9 (NIV)

1Paul, called to be an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, and our brother Sosthenes,
2To the church of God in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus and called to be holy, together with all those everywhere who call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ—their Lord and ours:

3Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Thanksgiving

4I always thank God for you because of his grace given you in Christ Jesus. 5For in him you have been enriched in every way—in all your speaking and in all your knowledge— 6because our testimony about Christ was confirmed in you. 7Therefore you do not lack any spiritual gift as you eagerly wait for our Lord Jesus Christ to be revealed. 8He will keep you strong to the end, so that you will be blameless on the day of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful.

Stuff I notice - and thoughts/questions it brings to the surface of me.

1) Paul is writing with his friend Sosthenes.

Who are my friends and encouragers in my journey? Am I building into them or just waiting for them to build into me? In what ways do I acknowledge them?

2) Paul's letter is to the church and all believers. Seems to be to both "the body" corporately as well as individuals who make up the body.

3) Wow - what a prayer/message of Thanksgiving in verses 4-9. The words that jump out at me are:

"enriched in every way" - I LOVE that! So often I have to deal with my own questions or the questions of others about what difference does it make to be a Christian if I just try to do good things. I serve, I care, I contribute. That is such a stumbling block for me at times to answer - and this verse simply says....God can use that and do it better. Better than you can possibly imagine. You won't know the difference until you let Him in - and that's a hard wall to break down. But oh....when you surrender your "good" works to Him and let him enrich your speaking...your knowledge. I LOVE that and find great comfort and challenge in it at the same time.

"our testimony about Christ was confirmed in you" - who has helped lead me, through their testimony...their love, compassion, lifestyle into my relationship with Christ? Have I thanked them? And who am I sharing my testimony with? (With my words and knowledge enriched through my relationship with God) My hope is that it will help lead to them confirming their relationship with Jesus some day.

4) As a body - we are not lacking in any spiritual gifts. How cool - and points to my need to be in community to experience the fullness of Christ supernaturally. I also love the phrase "as you eagerly wait" - nice contrast to be eager and waiting at the same time. What a sense of expectation - and makes me ask is that the attitude I bring - expectant, eager, watchful, intentional. What's my attitude?

Wow - 9 verses and LOTS there. Good stuff to keep rolling around. Feel free to share your own thoughts and how the passage impacts you this day!

Do you want in?

2009-06-02T12:01:00.000-07:00

Tony Myles offers a challenge - and opportunity - to view our summer a little differently. I'm in....are you? (I am a regular lurker at Tony's blog - and I encourage you to visit his thoughts often!)

If you are in - what are some ways we can stay connected and encourage each other along the way? Please feel free to share your ideas and thoughts!

Man, What A Race!

2009-06-02T06:33:00.000-07:00

I ran in the Go Northside 5K this past weekend. The picture here is of me and some of my race day fans - my wife, Kimpa and son, Alexey. It was the first time I have run in a "race" since high school. I was a pretty good runner in high school and have some great memories of races and friends from those times. Even so - the 5K I ran in this weekend has moved to the top of the list of my running experiences. Here's a few glimpses of the day.

Track and Weather - perfect! 68 degrees and breezy. The course was pretty flat with the exception of a nice downhill section with the wind during the second mile. It was also well marked and easy to follow. (Not that I had to ever worry about being in front - I had plenty of people to follow!)

People - all ages and stages. Serious to casual. The common factor - was friendliness. This was truly a "neighborhood" race. The course had many people standing in front of their homes cheering and shaking noise makers. There was a drum/dance line that played before and during the race. Good dogs/burgers provided afterwards. The race had a very cool vibe.

The run - I had set a goal of running at a 7 min/mile pace and I finished the 3.1 miles (I really have never converted to metric!) in 20:50.

Friends - I ran with two good friends - Lois and her son, Peter. Peter is 10 years old. He has run lots of races and even a mini/kids triathlon. I asked him before the race for advice. "Pace yourself and breathe." Good advice. He had set the goal of running around 28 minutes and just not stopping. He ran the course in 24:30 or so. Seriously. He won the "most amazing performance" award in my book.

Friends - part 2. My good friend Mitch (Lois' husband) came along to cheer for us all. He and Kimpa kept showing up along the course cheering. It was awesome.

Best moment - after the race I was walking with Alexey and Kimpa. Suddenly, Alexey was hugging me saying "good job, Dad." I can't put into words what that meant to me for a lot of reasons. I am going to have to write a separate post just on that moment. That made the whole day move into the incredible zone for me.

Yep - a good day. I can't wait for next year's race!

The Voices In My Head

2009-05-22T06:16:00.000-07:00

I know you must be wondering what is bouncing around in the head of a stay at home dad - if anything at all. Here are a few of the random quotes I have been collecting, pondering, and enjoying in my head recently. (I have linked to the original authors where I could if you would like to back track them some. Most I will share alone and out of context.)

"Are you listening to respond or listening to understand?" - From a Popp.com radio ad.

"As a follower of Christ you are called to be faithful - not successful" - Reverend Hillary Freeman, of the Community Justice Project. She was one of the presenters of the City Matters seminar through Sanctuary CDC. (If you are anywhere near Minneapolis you HAVE to attend this seminar. Challenge your perspectives for $25!)

"Don’t confuse insight with leadership. It’s easy to spot problems. It’s easy to spot holes in the system, things that are quite done right or perfectly. It’s easy to see the problems. The ability to see those problems doesn’t make a good leader. It makes a good critic.

Leaders see opportunities….solutions…possibilities. Leaders are willing to put shoulder to the plow to fix it. Leaders WORK the problem, not escalate the drama or create crisis. Secondary principle here for me is this - empower leaders, not critics." - Grant English on his blog.

"No wonder your tummy was so big, mommy!" - our friend's 3 y.o. daughter shortly after receiving a new bike while visiting her newborn sister in the hospital. It was a gift from her newborn baby sister. : )

"Jerry Maguire was a liar. That woman didn't complete him. You don't need anyone else to complete you. GOD will complete you!" - my paraphrase of Efrem Smith preaching on marriage at Sanctuary Covenant Church.

"Not even God can steer a car that isn't moving." - Marque Jensen during the City Matters course.

"If you've gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don't push your way to the front; don't sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don't be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand." - St. Paul, Philipians 2:1-4 (Msg)

What's been in your head....and heart.....this week?

Kindergarten, Nap Mats, and Marriage

2009-05-20T12:21:00.001-07:00

I met my wife in kindergarten. Really.

I have no memory of her from kindergarten....or of kindergarten really. I do remember those bright blue and red nap mats - which I think must mean I really looked forward to nap time or I really hated it. Being a boy I would guess that I hated it....but knowing that my future wife was in class with me....anyway. I do have my class photo from kindergarten and my wife, Kimpa, is in it. Oddly enough, I'm not....apparently I was sick that day.

Why am I sharing this? Because tomorrow is my 26th wedding anniversary...and I'm thankful.

Thankful for the ministry of marriage that God has ordained and blessed.

Thankful that God saw "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him. So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man." Genesis 2:18-25 (New American Standard Bible)

At a marriage retreat two weeks ago I came to understand that in my wife, God has crafted and fashioned for me a perfect gift. Not that my wife is perfect - but that she is the perfect gift for me....from God.

Twenty six years. Almost married long enough to be "that couple" that everyone applauds for and has a shot at winning the gift at the end of the marriage retreat for longest married. Never saw that one coming....

Twenty six years. Years of growing in my understanding of love. My understanding being transformed from how my wife makes me feel....to how I can show her love sacrificially. From trying to get her to change the things about her that bug me to seeing those edges as places that God is speaking to me....teaching me....loving me.

Twenty six years - holding hands, looking into those eyes, hoping and dreaming, raising four children, pondering together who God is....where does He want us to serve....walking along side each other and cheering for each other. Comforting each other without words. Being more known and knowing another person more than I could ever imagine - and treasuring that.

And looking forward to continued transformation and growing more and more in our understanding in what it means to be married...to love another...and being excited by that rather than tired or afraid.

At our marriage retreat a couple weeks ago we were challenged to speak the following to our spouse...and it bears repeating here....

Father God, I receive, by faith Kimpa, just as she is today. I receive Kimpa as Your perfect gift to me for a wife. I agree with You that You have given me this person for my good. Kimpa...I receive you as my perfect gift from God, and I thank Him for you in my life. I receive as His gift to me those areas of you I have been rejecting. Thank you for being my perfect gift. Amen.

Bring on the next twenty six, baby!

Holy Kiss, Batman!

2009-05-15T09:56:00.000-07:00

What I'm about to share has nothing to do with Batman. (Although I do think he rocks!)

It does have to do with kissing....and maybe even Holy kissing.

My son, Alexey, is in 4th grade. Definitely the age at which hand holding, hugging, and kissing your mom/dad becomes way less cool. Recently, I have been more aware of the times when Alexey does reach out for my hand as we are walking - because they are becoming more infrequent. (The last time was coming out of the movie theater after seeing Star Trek - which I thoroughly enjoyed...and the movie wasn't bad either.)

One of the treasures of my day is walking to the bus stop with Alexey. It is part of the rhythm of our day. Wake up, get breakfast, sign the school planner, brush teeth, fix hair (variable depending on the morning!), argue over whether or not to take a jacket, grab a soccer ball, football or other type of ball and then walk to the bus stop.

At the bus stop we'll play catch with the football or kick the soccer ball around. Even in winter. As we do so, we keep an eye out for the bus. You can see it just starting to round a corner and then it takes about 40 seconds for it to get to us. Somewhere along the way, Alexey decided that it wouldn't be cool to have his dad give him a kiss in front of the other kids as the bus pulls up. But - without my asking or suggesting - we fell into a pattern of when we see the bus, Alexey runs like mad up to me and gives me a hug and a kiss. I give him a quick kiss back tell him to have a great day and my son sprints to the bus stop. Having achieved a super human feat - meeting his desire to still give his dad a hug.....but not appearing uncool.

Maybe Alexey is Batman?

Nah, he isn't Batman. He is much more than that. He is God's precious and perfect gift to me. And for that I am humbled and grateful.

Holy kiss, indeed.

Greet one another with a holy kiss. 2 Corinthians 13:12

"Because, I Love Jesus"

2009-05-14T04:48:00.000-07:00

Before anything else....go to Grant English's blog and read this.

I'm a regular "lurker" at Grant's blog. I've never met Grant but I have come to respect him through his writing. (I would even encourage you to read his blog regularly....more so than mine!) Grant is a follower of Christ, husband, father, former youth pastor and a new lead pastor. I also believe he is a builder - of relationships and disciples and that he is helping to speed the breaking through of God's Kingdom in the here and now.

When I read the post about the phone call he received from a school district employee regarding his son.....

....it made me joyful. Being the parent of 4 children I can relate to what it's like to get calls like that. Starting off from "Oh no, what's my son done?" and ending at "WOW, that's what MY son has done!" is a great day.

....it made me hopeful. As a Christian, reading about the impact of our attitudes and our serving of others reminds me again it's not about what goes on inside the walls of our churches.

....it made me wonder. How do I respond when someone asks why I do/don't participate in something. And I got hung up on the phrase "Because, I love Jesus". And it has continued to resonate...convict....grow....and just won't leave me. As I have tossed that phrase around in my head I have come to love it. (Yes, you can put the well deserved "Well, duh" in right here.)

"Because I love Jesus" - takes the focus off of me and shines it onto Christ. When I make a God honoring decision and I'm in a position to share the "why" behind that decision I'm tempted to say "because it's the right thing to do (probably true)" or "because that's how I roll (okay, I don't ever say this...I'm too old!)". But if I say "because I love Jesus" then it's not because of MY rightousness....spirituality....individual convictions - it's because of the one who has transformed me and shown me a better way. It immediately points to Christ - opens up the opportunity for others to say "What? - c'mon...are you kidding me" and enter into a conversation that isn't focused on me but on what Christ has done for me. And how cool is that. The chance for seeds to be planted and lives to be changed and relationships to be built.

So, as a Dad, I want to be sure to share that phrase with my kids. To give them that "handle" to use in their conversations. And to continue to use it myself. And that when the phone rings, and it is my child's school......well I can hope can't I?

Brueggemann - "Preaching"

2009-05-13T13:00:00.000-07:00

What are your thoughts?

If you are a preacher....what do you think?

As a person that attends worship....what do you think?

As a person serving on a "board" at church...what do you think?

(ht - Mark Riddle)

Plugged In - part 2

2009-05-13T04:23:00.000-07:00

I started thinking through what are some of the habits that help keep me connected to God. You can find part 1 of this post here. In that post I talked about how music and running help me stay plugged in to God's spirit. Here are a couple other habits that I am finding important for me these days:

Fasting: While I don't have a regular schedule that I follow for fasting, it is one discipline that I have found to be very powerful and healthy. (Which of course begs the question why I don't make this a regular habit...hmmm.) Some of the benefits I have found of fasting include:

Space - by not worrying about what, when, with whom I am going to eat it adds HOURS to my day. Hours that I can use to ponder and/or listen for God.

Focus - as I turn away from food it automatically reminds me to turn toward God. Without stress, guilt, or other baggage - my focus on God seems to be more "pure" during periods of fasting.

Humility - this is important for me because I am wired to seek attention. When fasting, I usually have to answer the question "Why aren't you eating lunch?" and then I have a choice - to build myself up (I'm going super-spiritual today, baby!) or to deflect the question with something like...."I'm eating later". To go through the day connected to God...but not overtly sharing that and turning it into a day of "look how hard I work at my relationship with God" day is important for me.

Fasting also reminds me of God's abundance - that I can get thru a day relying on Him and knowing that He provides, prepares, and perseveres with me through all situations.

Fasting is a discipline rich in layers of connection to God and these are just a few of the things that I find attractive during those times.

Another way I stay plugged in and connected to God is through creating. I am an artist of sorts - I have a creative streak that runs through me and helps me connect to God in unique ways. Most of my creative juices flow around the idea of creating environments and unique learning activities that help create the opportunity for others to engage with God. Incorporating music, experiential worship and prayer activities, small group lessons, etc. I love to create environments where people can engage with God and in the planning...I experience God myself.

I still have a couple of other ways that I try to stay plugged in to God that I'll share later.

What are the habits that you have found most important to your journey to stay plugged in?

Go Northside 5K - Run, Cheer, Volunteer!

2009-05-07T07:42:00.000-07:00

If you are in the Minneapolis area it would be awesome if you could join me for the Northside 5K Run/Walk & Finish Line Festival. I will be running my first 5K since about 1980 so if you can come and run along with me....cheer....or volunteer that would be great! The race helps support Urban Homeworks and the Peace Foundation in Minneapolis.

So - put on your jogging shoes and join me for a little urban adventure!

Building blocks and memory loss

2009-05-05T15:09:00.000-07:00

I have a horrible memory. My memories of my childhood are pretty vague. I have a hard time remembering what specifically a book was about a week or so after I have read it. I'll think of a really awesome phrase or unravel a problem...only to watch it slowly drift into ??? I'll try to remember your name - repeat it after I meet you, write your name down and a detail about you, go for context, but.....it takes me a long time and LOTS of repetition to remember it. Maybe I'm lazy....maybe it's just me....maybe it's a guy thing....I don't' know. But I find it frustrating and it makes me tend to go even higher on the introvert scale. I'm not a particularly quick thinker, but I'm thoughtful - and it is frustrating to just watch those thoughts sail into good-bye.

God knows me. He knows I have a horrible memory. So he patiently builds into me. Through a thought here, an experience there, a conversation over lunch with a friend, a blog post read, a book that catches my attention, a class I'm invited to by a friend...He slowly, lovingly, patiently builds into me.

I've seen Him do it a number of times in my life where there is "convergence" of thoughts, ideas, and experiences that seem to shout out life change is coming or pay attention or join me.

I'm sensing now is another one of those "building block" times. God is trying to teach me about....move me toward....open my eyes to..........something to do with a deeper understanding of people who are different than me. People who are from different races, cultures, and economic situations.

Some of the building blocks include:

Books (I'm not really going to "review" these books as I honestly don't remember a lot of details *sigh* but I would recommend them each - how weird is that!):

Letters Across the Divide by David Anderson and Brent Zuercher - I actually have an autographed copy of this book! Apparently I picked it up in 2003. It is a true story of two friends, one African American and the other white, that explores racism, friendship, and faith thru a series of letters they exchange.

same kind of different As me. by Ron Hall and Denver Moore - I just finished this book a week or so ago and it totally captivated me. It is a true story about a homeless man who started out life as a sharecropper and an upscale art dealer who end up becoming friends. The paths that their lives take to introduce them to each other and the relationships that form because of it are fascinating.

the beautiful struggle by ta-nehisi coates - I read this book last year probably because I saw someone post about it or read a review in a magazine. It is a beautifully written book. Honestly much of the language that was used was unfamiliar to me - some urban terms, some hip hop, just different. But the phrasing, use of language was too engaging to put down. You should read this review to really get a flavor for this true story of a young black man's journey to adulthood in Baltimore.

Church - We have been worshiping at Sanctuary Covenant Church, a multi-ethnic, multi-racial, multi-cultural church that has challenged my thinking. Can you say "Hip-Hop Sunday!"

Classes - City Matters - a class offered by the Sanctuary's Community Development Corporation that teaches around Urban issues. It has really opened my eyes, and heart, to issues of poverty, justice, race, and faith in the city. If you live anywhere near the Minneapolis area this is a class you should seek out and attend.

And so it goes. I might not "remember" much. But somehow all of these experiences are building into me and preparing my heart for something God is already doing and wants me to join in. My prayer is that I recognize what that is....and respond with all of my heart, soul, mind and strength.

Confessions of a stay at home dad...

2009-05-05T12:07:00.001-07:00

Sometimes, I feel guilty about being a stay at home dad. I mean....my youngest child is 10 years old. My days during the school year are all mine from 9 -3 every day. I am the luckiest guy in the world to be able to have the opportunity to be a primary influence on my kids during these years but....at times....I still feel guilty.

I feel a tremendous amount of pressure.....let's see, that's not really the right word....responsibility to use my time wisely. Trying to define "wisely" is the challenge. When I first became a stay at home dad it was all about staying busy. I was actually afraid that I would run out of things to do....or....not do enough to justify me being home. Uhhh.....yeah....there is always plenty to do. As I have matured in this role of stay at home dad, I have discovered that I have to prioritize what is important. Here are a few of the highlights for me....

Sending and greeting - I treasure the fact that I get to wake up my kids and "send" them off to school...and be there when they get home. That simple, often brief, interaction can help determine the attitude and mood we all will carry into the day and/or evening. Small moments that in a few years will no longer be needed.

Preparing dinner - I love to cook. I'm not great at it....but I love being slighty creative and trying stuff in the kitchen. I also love the fact that by me taking the time to prepare a meal it helps form a gathering point for us all to check in. Honestly....as our life goes....we probably eat out 3X week and can only all sit down together for a meal about 2-3 times during the week. But those times are significant and beautifully mundane.

Pondering - I'm an introvert at heart. I like to roll thoughts around in my head for way too long before I can let them go, come to a conclusion, or just get distracted to the next thought. Being a stay at home dad allows me to just "sit and think" at times. This is important for me.

Getting out - Since I'm an introvert at heart I could easily and comfortably fall into the habit of not reaching out to people during the day. This is a temptation I fight every week. I have found that by listening and intentionally spending time with others - even if it is as simple as eating at the same restaurant during the week for lunch to get to know the wait staff - it helps me grow in understanding and patience. (Anyone for lunch at Ruby Tuesday's!)

Napping - I used to feel guilty about napping during the day. My wife has repeatedly told me this is okay....and that has truly been a gift. (Either way I would still nap - but I can nap with a clear consience!) My body rhythms are such that I really start to shut down between about 1 - 3 pm. Listening to my body and resting.....is good.

Those are just a few - and of course I do actually "work my list" still. Laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, post office, bank, dry cleaner....repeat. But I know that the reason I stay home isn't in what I accomplish....but that I stay home in spite of what I accomplish (as Kimpa will occasionally remind me!)....because it has a huge postive impact on our family.

The other confession I have is that I am the luckiest guy in the world to have married such a Christ centered, supportive, intelligent woman.....who has blessed me in so many ways. And what a privilege it is to walk through life together raising our children - and growing more in love with each other as the seasons pass. God is good.

Plugged In

2009-05-01T08:59:00.001-07:00

I mused here a little about how I need to stay connected to God and what happens when I don't. After a little pondering I have come up with a list of habits (I don't want to use the word discipline for some reason!) that help me stay 'plugged in'. They are not perfect nor do they work perfectly. They are a fairly fluid mix and my ability to engage God through them varies drastically. But for me, I have found that when I follow through with these habits....I better stay in the flow of listening for, resting in, and following God's spirit. Here are a couple to start with:

Music - both playing and listening. I am a drummer and a beginning guitar player. My first desire in college was to be a jazz drummer. I have a love of music that I can't truly express. But music speaks to me....not just lyrics but the creation of music - all kinds of sounds. When I listen, whether it be secular or not, I can often be moved into the presence of God. Music calms my soul, moves my spirit, and can change my emotions. On the playing side - I worship God thru playing - especially the drums. Sounds crazy....how impacting a piece of metal or a synthetic drum head can be worship....but it moves me to a place that I connect with God and can "rest" in His presence.

Running - Running for me is my "quiet" time. It allows me to disengage from the "to do" list and focus. I usually start my runs saying, "Dear Lord Jesus, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner." I'll repeat that over and over and just let it sink in until it is sort of running in the background. Then I'll start to pray....and see what bubbles up. So many times a situation, a specific verse, a small phrase will pop up and I'll play with that for quite a while. The hard part is remembering after the run what I was pondering....so I try to journal a little right afterwards and come back later to flesh out those nudgings. I have found that I can't run while listening to music (funny that I can't combine the running with music!) because I focus too much on the music and not on listening. Interesting....

So those are the first two I'll share.....more later....gotta go play the guitar and go for a run!

My Attributes....Not God's

2009-04-29T11:00:00.000-07:00

Lukewarm. Apathetic. Lazy. Fatigued. Busy. Disengaged. Distant. Disinterested.

I had a stretch awhile back that I was wondering (complaining?) about where God was. Nothing particulalry bad was going on in my life. But it felt like I was just going through the motions.

I fell into the trap of believing that it was God that had pulled back from me. I kept asking God to give me the desire to love Him more....to want Him more....to give me the energy and time to experience Him. I started to apply to him the list of attributes that I was feeling.

Lukewarm. Apathetic. Lazy. Fatigued. Busy. Disengaged. Distant. Disinterested.

At some point I finally stopped whining. I decided to think about those activities that were present in my life when I have felt most engaged and "in the flow" with God and His Spirit. It didn't take long to make that list....and then realize that I was not particpating in any of those activities. God hadn't moved of course.....I had lost my focus and my discipline. I had stopped pursuing Him - and God had honored that decision. God is patient...

I'll share that list in the future.

But before I do - what would you put on your list?

Are you actively working that list? Do you need to add or delete some things from that list?

Are you letting your feelings about God become attributes of God that He doesn't possess?

This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It's adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike "What's next, Papa?" God's Spirit touches our spirits and confirms who we really are. We know who he is, and we know who we are: Father and children. And we know we are going to get what's coming to us—an unbelievable inheritance! We go through exactly what Christ goes through. If we go through the hard times with him, then we're certainly going to go through the good times with him! Romans 8:15-17

The perfect start to Father's Day?

2009-04-29T06:19:00.001-07:00

I don't usually start to think about Father's Day this early but.....this would be a nice gift!

Voices

2009-04-28T07:25:00.000-07:00

I had the privilege of volunteering at the Simpson Housing Shelter for homeless men last week. You can read a brief post that overviews that experience here. But for this post I wanted to focus on the voices that I heard from the guests that I listened to.

The first thing that I noticed about the voices that I heard was that most of them were hard to hear. The majority of the guys talked in hushed tones. It forced me to really listen and focus when I had a conversation with them. This was most noticeable during dinner. I had the opportunity to sit with 3-4 different men during dinner and it took all of my energy to really hear them - both from a sound standpoint and from a "don't try to think of how I should respond while they are still talking" standpoint.

Maybe some of the quiet in their voice was....

...fatigue. It must be very wearing physically, emotionally and spiritually to be on the street all day.

...fear. That a conversation they have will rob them of an opportunity they are pursuing if it is overheard. They are all struggling for resources and there are only so many available so they speak quietly of their opportunities....if they choose to share them at all.

...they want to draw you close and really listen. Yep, it could be that they want you to truly focus on them.

...shame. They are embarrassed about their situation, or their clothes, or ______, and so they speak softly....looking away or downward while still wanting to be heard.

...that's just the way they speak.

Of course, their was also the occasional guy that spoke loudly...trying to control his environment by the sheer volume with which they spoke. But that was the exception rather than the rule on this particular night.

Regardless of the volume of their voices....God spoke to me thru many of them and for that I am thankful. I hope that they somehow felt His love in those moments as well.

O Lord, hear my voice. Let your ears be attentive to my cry for mercy. Psalm 130:2

Music Profiling

2009-04-27T12:24:00.000-07:00

(The following thoughts and/or reactions are soley my response to what I saw today. I have not looked into any factual basis for what I experienced/observed. In other words...it is totally from my perspective.)

I had some time to kill after an appointment in Burnsville today. Nothing like a mocha and some browsing at the local Christian bookstore to make the time fly by so I ventured into Northwestern Bookstore in Burnsville.

I have recently been worshipping at Sanctuary Covenant Church in Minneapolis and they will often have worship times that include hip-hop, latin, gospel flavored music and I am more of a "The Refuge" (contemporary Christian / Alternative Rock) kind of guy so I thought I'd expand my musical base a little....and maybe start to recognize more of the music I'm listening to and trying to participate with.

First I browsed the "new artist" section and picked up a Remedy Drive CD. Then on to the Gospel Section and picked up The Essential Fred Hammond. Next I ventured into the hip-hop section and...didn't pick up anything at first because all of the cases were empty shells. (Sort of like at Blockbuster when you are looking for a movie!) It was very noticeable because the hip-hop section is pretty small, on it's own rack set apart for the rest of the CD's and is the only section that was presented this way.

Oh yeah, and then there was the sign over the rack that said "Thou Shall Not Steal" - God and NW bookstores.

I don't think this would have bothered me a couple of years ago...but recently God has been opening my eyes to people who are different than me in new ways. And this little "empty shell" display that required you to get your CD from the clerk up front, combined with the "Thou Shall Not Steal" sign made me angry....and sad. I eventually grabbed the Urban D Unorthodox shell (he had come to Sanctuary a few weeks ago and led some worship time) and went to the front counter. I asked why they had they had the hip hop section displayed this way - and the clerk said that it is because "a lot of those types of CD's get stolen".

Okay, I get that. It makes sense to me for the store to notice that a certain item is more likely to be stolen and try to do things to protect their products from being lifted. But this just struck me as over the top.

First - it seems to say people who listen to hip-hop CHRISTIAN artists are more likely to steal. And I don't think it is a stretch to connect that with specific ethnic people groups/cultures. I know my first reaction when browsing that section and seeing it is the only "product controlled" section was wondering if people were watching me extra close as I browsed. It made me feel uncomfortable just looking at the CD's. (Apparently people who buy contemporary Christian, gospel, latin, alternative or any other genre of music are less likely to steal?)

Second - the bright neon green 8.5X11 "Thou Shalt Not Steal" sign. C'mon. Really? The product has all been removed anyway so what is the point of the sign? All it does is further communicate to people wandering around the store the assumption that people that listen to hip-hop are likely to steal and need to be reminded that God (and NW bookstore!) doesn't want them to. The sign is what really put the whole experience into the category of "stereotype" for me. (To me the sign and way the CD's are displayed is basically silently and indelibly screaming - if you stand in front of this section you better not be one of THOSE people that listen to hip-hop and steal CD's. You should know better and in case you forgot we, the good people of NW bookstore, are reminding you. Oh, and everyone else is watching you as well at this point!)

The whole thing just made me feel icky.

Of course the other part of the ick was that after I left and started thinking thru it all....I thought I should have asked to talk to the store manager - to find out why they had the CD's displayed as they did and then share how I felt as I looked at the CD's. My bad...'cause nothing will change without conversation and engaging people. Okay - fine. I'll go back and talk to them....and blog about it later. Hold me to it tho....I am SUCH a conflict avoider.

I'd love to hear your thoughts as well. Keep in mind - this is ALL told from only my perspective and is subject to over-simplification on my part.

But how does this strike you? And thoughts about how I should follow up?

"Do small things with great love."

2009-04-23T15:19:00.000-07:00

"Do small things with great love." - Mother Teresa

That small phrase is what would best describe the goal I set for my night of serving at Simpson Housing Services. I have lots to ponder following my experience but thought I'd throw in a quick overview here before I post some other thoughts. For a basic description of the shelter I volunteered at and the services the men there can receive you can go here.

Okay - this is the first time I have chosen to interact with people that are homeless. At least in a meaningful, more personal way. Sure, I've handed out money, made sandwiches, and done other such activities - but had never put myself in a position where I would have hours of face time with a person who is without a home. Yep, I was a little apprehensive. But it was awesome!

On a given night there are two overnight volunteers that serve from 5:45 pm until 7:00 am. The three shelter staff start work at 3 pm and leave around 10:15 pm - shortly after all the guests are supposed to be in bed. The volunteers are basically the "eyes and ears" of the staff. We take care of the guests basic needs (there are about 46 overnight guests each night) - handing out supplies, making coffee, directing traffic a little (where to get what), etc. Meeting needs and making them feel cared for and safe. This frees up the staff to meet with guests one on one and do the work of trying to provide better access to care for their guests with the ultimate goal of obtaining permanent housing for them. The volunteers rotate their turns sleeping - one from 10 -2 the other from 2 - 6. I split the difference as I am "shadowing" so I got to try to sleep from 12 - 4...but mainly I just listened to the sounds around me.

My first impression was that this was a lot like a youth lock-in! I've helped organize many a lock-in for high school kids and there were some similarities....especially in the personalities that were present. The introvert, the helper, the funny guy, the really smart guy, the guy that gets picked on a lot, the guy that thinks none of the rules apply to him, the guy who knows how to work they system....but after spending time with them....the facades start to come down and the real stuff starts to come out. Lots of sadness, anger, loss of hope...balanced with gratefulness, contentment, and the beginnings of hope.

I tried really hard to learn names. Thru the course of the evening I had about 10 conversations with specific guests that allowed me to listen to at least part of their stories. It was humbling to listen in on their journeys. Some had been homeless for years....some for just a couple of weeks.

Each face and story was unique - and I tried to respond to each one with love. Thru a smile, an encouraging word, a handshake, cookies and milk, coffee....caring. But of course...in the process I was changed. More on that later.

So - it was an evening of small moments that were incredibly rich. I can't wait to go back. The volunteer schedule is already full for May....and I find myself disappointed rather than relieved. NOT what I expected. But of course with God in the middle of it....what else should I expect!

Small moments, small things....hopefully done with great love, indeed.

Serving at Simpson

2009-04-22T08:06:00.000-07:00

I have been blessed by others. One of those blessings is our good friends the Heglands. Their family and ours hang out a lot and have become quite the commune. A couple of months ago Lois (the mom) arranged for our families to make some sandwiches and deliver them to the Simpson Homeless Shelter downtown. They provide the sandwiches to their overnight shelter guests in the morning so they have a lunch for the day. As part of the experience we heard about the opportunity to become an overnight volunteer. That caught my attention (and Mitch and Lois') and we attended an orientation session to become overnight volunteers.

Well...tonight is my first night to be an overnight "shadow" volunteer. I'll basically hang out with the other two volunteers and learn the ropes of caring for the men that stay at the shelter. Yep, I'm a little apprehensive. But I figure if I just keep asking myself - How can I show them respect, love, and care....it will be just fine. I'm more worried about MY behavior than theirs...should be fascinating.

One more step into God opening my eyes and teaching me how to better see others with and through His. Besides...I'm not only looking with His eyes...but looking at Him in the faces of the men I will be serving. How cool is that?

I love sunsets....

2009-04-21T07:01:00.000-07:00

God said, "It is not good for man to be alone; I'll make him a helper, a companion."

Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh.

Yep.....

"Do you love me?"

2009-04-20T11:32:00.000-07:00

When Jesus asks that question.....how do I respond? This quote from A.W. Tozer struck home with me today....

"O God, I have tasted Thy Goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need for further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, so that I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, "Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away." Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long."

Small moments - huge blessings

2008-11-13T09:35:00.000-08:00

Small moments.....

High fives and hugs from my 16 y.o. son when he gets good news...

Walking in the woods with a my 10 y.o. son along with a friend and his son...just talking and listening to the sounds in the woods...

"Hey Dad, let me do this now in case I don't have time when the bus comes" - and then I get a hug and a kiss from my 4th grade son while waiting for the bus - sitting in our car because it is raining...

Hugs from my 19 y.o. daughter along with the words...I love you...while visiting at college.

a lunch date with my 22 y.o. daughter just to catch up and say "how are you, really?"

Honest answers from my wife when I ask her, "What are some things that I do that irritate you?" Followed by a list she creates on her own of the many things that I do that tell her I love her.

Yup, I'm a lucky man. And I am thankful for a God who creates HUGE blessings out of small moments.

"Hey, let's be careful out there!"

2008-05-12T08:00:00.000-07:00

Yep - it's official. My son has successfully obtained his driver's license. Why does this feel different than when my two daughters obtained theirs?

Drew is actually a very good driver. And it was a great morning spending time together and then celebrating with breakfast at Baker's Square. Sharing these moments together is priceless. Nice job, Drew!

Hey, let's be careful out there...indeed! (Quote from Sgt. Phil Esterhaus of Hill Street Blues)

Immersed for the weekend

2008-04-25T12:13:00.000-07:00

My wife and I are going on an "Urban Immersion" weekend retreat. This will be the first time we have done a mission/service activity without one of our sons/daughters along. We are going as part of our church's youth group. Interestingly we have an almost equal number of "adults" to "youth". (Not quite Kara Powell's 5:1 ratio for adults to youth but getting there!)

Not sure what to expect. Which is the part I'm most excited about - letting God speak through others instead of speaking through my filters...

Okay...I'm off to be immersed...my hope is that first I'll be immersed in God...and then have the opportunity to be immersed in serving His children - and in the adventure get to know someone else's story a little better!

Christian conversations

2008-04-16T14:40:00.000-07:00

While standing in line at the local Christian bookstore I had the following comments made to me while talking about why i was wearing a 30 hour famine t-shirt...

Person #1
"I used to go to ____church but now i go to____. We are planting two churches you know. I don't know where I'll choose to go yet. Does the money from the famine all go to world vision? Hunger really isn't a problem we will ever solve. It's so big. (whispering now) I hope you enjoy learning about patience...every time I come here they are SO slow."

Person#2
"I go to ____church. Yeah, it's great for my kids but I sure wish they had more women's ministry programs. I guess as long as my kids are happy tho, we'll keep going. Sometimes I just wish there was more for me."

Maybe it was just my take on the conversations...but I left feeling icky.

Conference Quotes

2008-04-13T05:28:00.000-07:00

Here are some of the random quotes that are rolling around in my head as I continue to process and think about all that I heard while at the Shift Conference at Willow Creek. This is simply a brain dump - no particular order and all quotes are obviously taken out of context...so read with caution! (I have also done my best to give credit where credit is due...)

Kara Powell

"Balance is what we find as we swing from one extreme to the other."
"Red Bull Youth Ministry"
"When God is looking at you what expression do you see?"
"Don't do mindless youth ministry"
"Resources make it too easy" (Don't need to rely upon God!)

Aaron Niequist

"Unforgiveness is a poison that we drink in hoping it kills someone else" (Rory Noland?)
"Talking about music is like dancing about architecture." (Elvis Costello?)
"Worship opens our eyes to what is already there."
"What are the words we are putting on peoples lips?"
"To work in a church is to get hurt." (We are human after all! What are you doing with the hurt inside of you?)

Shane Claiborne

"Where is your Calcutta?" (Mother Theresa?)
"Don't just look at people differently - look at them with new eyes - the eyes of Jesus."
"Look for Jesus in his most distressing disguises."
"It's not how much we do, it's how much we love."

Mark Yaconelli

"In this culture - cancer/illness - is our Sabbath."

Other speakers that I heard were Dan Kimball and Brian McClaren.

Dan was probably my fave speaker - even tho I have no quotes to share. He had a great message of balance in living/sharing Christ for the here and now...and for sharing Christ to impact others for the future of our eternal lives in (or outside of) the Kingdom. Was an important message for me to hear in those moments.

Brian was also great to hear. I had heard him speak once before and got to hear him twice during the conference. His spoke with gentelness and respect- challenged my thinking - and was gracious. I truly enjoyed his words of looking at the issues the church focuses on vs. the issues that people are dealing with. Opened up a bigger picture...good words...that hopefully lead to action for furthering God's Kingdom.

So there ya go! Don't you feel like you were there now....

Hangin' at Willow

2008-04-09T06:57:00.000-07:00

Yeah...so it's been almost a year since I last connected with myself (and others) in this format. Maybe I'm back....don't know yet.

At the moment, I'm sitting at the Willow Creek SHIFT conference waiting for it all to begin. I'm looking forward to being challenged, encouraged, and renewed. Plus i get to hang with Darrin, Ali, and Jenna....very cool.

A lot has happened in the last year...more to come...maybe.

Anointing Alexey

2007-05-07T09:57:00.000-07:00

A conversation with my 8.y.o. son, Alexey, while we are getting ready for school this morning....

"What's that stuff, Dad?"

"That's a vial of oil. We used it this weekend to anoint one another."

"What's anointing?"

Dad then does his best to describe anointing....a symbol of God's promise, blessing, being set apart, of God's spirit falling upon you, part of a prayer....way to much info for an 8 y.o.

Alexey resumes working on his math sheet....then asks....

"Do you have to be a certain age to be anointed?"

"Nope - would you like me to anoint you?"

"I dunno."

Dad continues to fold clothes, pack snacks, start the grocery list for the day.

"Hey dad, yeah, I guess I'd like to be anointed."

So we finish up a few things and I get distracted by something and a few minutes later Alexey says - "Don't forget to anoint me!"

So I stop. I grab my bible...we read a couple of passages that speak to anointing from James and Psalms. I share with him what I will do - pray a blessing over him while I anoint his head with oil in the sign of a cross.

"Do I close my eyes?"

"You don't have too."

I anoint my son. He is looking at me as I pray for him. His eyes are SO big. Jesus is living there.

We finish.

"Can you see it?" "What's it look like?!"

We go to the mirror and look. You can see a small, shiny cross on his forehead.

"Can you still see where you got anointed?"

"Nope - I've washed my head too many times since then."

"Hmmm.....hey Dad - want to wrestle!?"

And life goes on.....Praise God from whom all blessings flow.

Perception vs. Reality

2007-05-07T09:06:00.000-07:00

I went to "The Core" this weekend. The topic was on "Helping Hurting Kids". This was the third year in a row I've attended. As usual - good training and good fellowship. I love having an opportunity to better equip our volunteers and parents - and in so doing better equip our kids. It is also great to get to know each other better outside of church.

One of the videos they used was from "The Skit Guys" showing youth ministry perceptions vs. reality. It was well done - and you can track it down here.

It has got me thinking about a conversation we had in SMYG a couple of weeks ago...

We were talking about the story of Jesus turning water into wine. (I used Laurie Polich's "Studies on the Go - John" and Grant English's devo on the passage as a frame - both great resources)

One of the questions I asked our kids was from Laurie's book -

"If you were going to throw a party with your friends and you had the opportunity to have Jesus there, do you think the party would be more fun or less fun? Why?"

The couple of students that answered - out of about 30 - generally said, "If it was a party of Christ followers it would be sweet, but He would probably make my friends who aren't Christians uncomfortable."

As I've replayed that sentiment in my head here are the questions it brings up....

* How does the kid's perception of Jesus relate to what we see of Jesus in the bible? To me it seems Jesus made those that are religious more uncomfortable than those that weren't.

* Is their perception of Christ a reflection of my teaching? Is this how I come across in my relationship with Christ? Lord, forgive me.

* Are the kids more worried about what their "non Christian" friends think about Jesus....or what Jesus thinks about them....or what Jesus thinks about their friends? I wonder where they think Jesus' focus would be during the party?

There are so many more questions it brings up.

Many of them make me uncomfortable - and bottom line is all I can say is God forgive me - and thank you for opening my eyes.

Happy Birthday, Drew

2007-05-04T15:20:00.000-07:00

This past Wednesday (and Thursday) we celebrated my son's birthday. He turned 15.

I can see God transforming him - and it is cool to see - through his relationships, his choices, his priorities. It is such a privilege to be a parent.....and to be entrusted to nurture, encourage, support, and guide along side a child.

I know that you read this at times....so I won't get too emotional here....but know that you are loved.

15 years. Great memories. Praise God for the blessing of my son Drew. Happy Birthday, Drew.

Woodpeckers, caulk, holes, and desert

2007-04-25T15:10:00.000-07:00

I recently have been trying to do more of the house "things" that need attention - but everytime I look at one area....another pops up!

Today I discovered that the caulking job "Mr. Handyman" (the company...not me!) did has disintegrated in less than a week.

The corner of my yard near my driveway looks a lot like desert.

And there is a hole in my siding from a woodpecker - apparently a Federally protected bird - you can guess why I might know that!

Oh, and I just had a new roof put on my home two weeks ago.

Oh, oh and while I was looking at my outside walls I pushed on the corner of a board and my finger went through it. Not good.

I can't wait to live in a 2 bedroom condo again......

*sigh*

8 y.o. quotes

2007-04-24T13:07:00.000-07:00

Some quotes between my son, Alexey, and his best friend, Peter.....

"When I die, I want to die in my sleep. Yeah, that would be the best way to go."

"If you lived next door to me....that would be like heaven!"

Man, there is so much about those quotes - and about their relationship that is true and pure and simple.

"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3

Lots there to ponder.....enjoy!

"Do I know the poor"

2007-04-20T14:22:00.000-07:00

I wrote the following for our "Church" newsletter.....pray for me to follow through....

At the 30 hour famine in February we got to hear Shane Claiborne speak and share his life experiences living as what he describes as an “ordinary radical”. (I highly recommend his book, The Irresistible Revolution, but be prepared to squirm as you read it!) One of the quotes in the book that made me squirm was, “the great tragedy in the church is not that rich Christians do not care about the poor but that rich Christians do not know the poor.”

Ouch!

Yeah, I’ve tried to rationalize that statement with really great thoughts like – “I know the poor in spirit” or “I know those that are poor in relationships” or “I know those that are poor in joy” as well as REALLY great thoughts like – “But I’m very active serving in the life of my church”…..but ultimately these feel like excuses to me. Or at least attempts by me to distract myself from what God is really saying to me. (And since I’m wrestling with God it’s obvious that I’m not really distracted – I just don’t want to have this conversation!)

As I ponder this ultimately I think I’m afraid.

Afraid of how “knowing the poor” may change my heart.

…..may change my priorities.

…..may change my life.

…..may transform my relationship with God.

Well – I don’t know if I am brave enough to have this conversation by myself. I at least need someone to walk along with me and help me process my thoughts. (But my prayer is that I can go beyond “thinking” and enter into “living”.) So here is an invitation….

Would you like to explore ways that we can truly get to “know the poor” better? I don’t care what age you are, what stage of life you are in, or any of that. We are the church – and we need each other. Specifically, I need your help in moving from caring….to knowing. I don’t know what that will look like. So come – with no expectations…no plan of action…entering into the unknown.

Suddenly...it hits me...

2007-04-19T12:17:00.000-07:00

I sat down today and realized that for many - this has been a horrible couple of weeks.

I have read locally a story about a man who allegedly fabricated a story saying he found a child wandering and turned him over to police/social services....when it was actually his own child.

A teenage girl gives birth to a baby and stabs her over 100 times and throws the baby's body away.

A college student kills 32 others.

I'm busy planning lessons, thinking up fun/messy games, feeling like I'm connected to God in many ways.....

But now....as I pause in my day....I feel like crying.

The heart of God must be grieving so.

Do our kids feel some of this?

The events of this past couple of weeks are probably raising a lot of questions in the minds of our kids....

Feelings of abandonment - maybe wondering if their Dad had a chance to pawn them off...would he? Or wondering why Dad left...was it because he couldn't get rid of me....so he hit the road?

When our kids see a pregnant teen at school - do they wonder if the mom will kill the baby? Do they wonder if a student looks overweight if they are hiding a pregnancy? Are they sad for the mom...the baby...both? Neither?

Are they feeling less safe today in their schools? Are the graduating seniors a little less excited about going to college now?

Are they wondering where God is in all of this? Are you?

I've appreciated a couple of the resources at Youth Specialties designed to help youth workers help their students in these days. They have helped me start to process - and start the process for me as a youth worker - in my response to all that surrounds, invades, and disturbs our kids...and myself.

There are no concrete answers, no simple solutions, but I like the tone....and it spoke to me.

"I've got that" - God

2007-04-18T20:10:00.000-07:00

So today started off with me being uncomfortable.

But I started the day with God...and tried to remain with Him. Here are some of the things I noticed along the way....

My list of "to do's" was long. I wasn't comfortable delaying them to spend time with God. Yet, I noticed there was a confidence the rest of the day that "all is well". It grew as the day progressed.

Little things that happened that opened up space -

* I was able to think clearly (and creatively?) to write articles quickly that were due.

* The Direct TV guy was delayed from arriving so I had more space to "think/work" this a.m.

* The cleaners didn't come until very late in the day when I wasn't home. (yeah, sometimes I'm embarrassed that I have a cleaning service for my home)

* I was able to come up with an idea for a game and lesson for our Jr. High gathering tonight during lunch.

* I went running after lunch and had a great flow of ideas to make the lesson I had read thru "come alive" (John 8:1-11 The story of the woman caught in adultery - great Jr. High stuff!)

* I had scheduled with a friend to watch their son this afternoon - of course that meant that my son, Alexey, had a playmate all afternoon which allowed me to make the Powerpoint and purchase the supplies I needed for tonights game/lesson.

* I also noticed that my desire to "be with" the kids tonight was growing - the joy of just being in community with them was very appealing today - more so than my "worry" about the lesson. That is unusual (sadly) and was a nice moment of realization.

* I happened to run into my daughter, Kelsey, at the High School as I arrived to wait for my son, Drew, to finish track practice. She offered to take Alexey and his friend, Peter, and wait for Drew...then take them all out to dinner and watch them the rest of the evening...without me asking. Suddenly, I am free to get to church to set up the game, lesson, etc. Wow.

Very cool. And then, I had a fabulous time "subbing" for our usual leader, Steve, tonight at Powerhouse (our Jr. High gathering). I can see Christ growing in the kids....we had a great conversation tonight about judging others, how encounters with Jesus leave us changed, and more. And man...they bring so many of their friends it just rocks!

At the end of the day I am able to look back and know that I accomplished all that God intended me to. It was as if all day long God was saying, "I've got that". I still have a long list of things to do. I'm still uncomfortable with the size of that list and all that needs to be done in the next 48 hours. But I'm going to try to have coffee with God again tomorrow morning....and linger with him throughout the day. All is well...goodnight!

Uncomfortable

2007-04-18T07:10:00.000-07:00

I've been up since 4:45 a.m.

The list of things I need to get to is long.

I felt the nudge to start my time today with God - so I made coffee and talked to God, read a little of Colossians, pondered a couple of things.

I am trusting that I will get done what God wants me to this day.

I can't say I'm comfortable with that...and a large part of me says "You should have started right in on _________ instead of coffee time with God."

Ever feel like that?

Clearing the Temple Update #3

2007-04-13T09:03:00.000-07:00

For a little history you can go here and here.

It's been a little over 4 months since I was diagnosed with diabetes.

I've been exercising regulary - primarily running now - averaging about 20 miles a week over the past month.

I've lost about 35#. People are starting to comment on my weight loss - many of them not quite sure if it is good (because of exercise) or bad (may be related to a health problem - especially since our church family has been through that journey together recently....of course now that I think of it...it is related to a health problem!)

A few weeks ago I returned to my doctor for my three month check of my glucose levels and......

I'm officially "non-diabetic" again. Wow.

A few observations:

Okay, I admit it....I actually like running now.
I thank God for my kids every time I write in the journal they made for me.
My body is finally starting to rebel a little...I am old.
The spiritual blessings continue to exceed the physical. The conversations I have with God during my running....or just the "silence" are precious.
I love running outside more than on the treadmill.
I have to be careful not to become "prideful" in this experience and remember it was God that slapped me around to finally get me started on taking care of the temple He has provided for me.

God is good....and I'm a running nerd.

Director of Youth Ministries Search goes "LIVE"

2007-03-31T11:52:00.000-07:00

Our search for the person to join the gathering known as Eden Prairie Presbyterian Church as our new Director of Youth Ministries has just gone "live" this week.

Intrigued? You can find out more about the position here. (Go check it out and then come back)

We would love you to join us in prayer as part of the process - go with how you're led or use the frame below - a chorus of voices is so cool!

Dear Lord Jesus - Help us patiently persevere........remaining in your presence......as we listen, ponder, and respond to the plan you are weaving together in this place. May it all glorify you!

Amen.

I love life...but do I live love?

2007-03-29T13:19:00.000-07:00

Because of my recent experiences, I have been pondering life and death. This verse has been rolling around in my head....

I am the Gate. Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.

I am the Good Shepherd. The Good Shepherd puts the sheep before himself, sacrifices himself if necessary. John 10:9-11 (Msg)

It's made me think of the stages of my life....and my understanding of it. Here are some of my ponderings and random thoughts.

In the beginning....I tried to just get through "my life". As a kid growing up there were things about my family I wanted to hide - secrets I didn't want others to know about. Life was all about trying to "hide and survive"....and very lonely and scary.

During college...I got married! My life and understanding of it changed a lot. I had to learn to share my life - and share of myself. To begin to live those catchy Christian words - transparent and authentic. (Even though I wasn't a Christ follower yet.) Life was no longer lonely - but not "full" - and still scary!

As a twenty-somthingish adult, Jesus works through a small group to transform my understanding of life - living in community. Wow - I become a Christ follower - sort of dog paddle that for awhile (not really going anywhere) and then Kimpa signs us up for a small group. My life will never be the same. I start learning about Christ, God, the Holy Spirit. I start seeing outside of myself and have a chance to be a blessing to others and allow myself to be blessed. I am carried through times of crisis, chaos, and grief - and help carry and encourage others. My life is becoming "full" - I am no longer lonely and scared. I still have lots of questions but I can start to see those other catchy Christian words actually happening - spiritual growth / transformation.

Today - My perceptions continue to change. Yeah, I love life and it feels full (in a fabulously grand way) ...but now I ponder if I live love in my daily experiences. I know that the fullness of my life isn't reserved just for the future - but for the now. And I have discovered that I can experience that by trying to allow myself to act and react through the eyes, ears, and heart of Jesus. That I may experience fullness in sacrifice, messy relationships, and in the presence of God.

That is my prayer today - that I not only love life....but that I may live a life of love now, today, to the glory of God.

I hate death

2007-03-15T18:15:00.000-07:00

I hate death.

My sister in Christ, Amy, gently left this part of creation tonight to touch the face of God - a face that she reflected so brightly throughout the time that I have known her.

She and her family had persevered together for the past two years battling a cancer that slowly took over...and took away....her body.

But Christ remained in her as she abided in Him.....and could not be defeated.

A friend invited me to go along with her to see Amy today - a few hours before she died.

My memories will be of her smile....her hug....her whispers....her family gathered....the peaceful spirit that filled a sterile environment.

It reminded me of my Mom's struggle with lung cancer some years ago - and her last words to me being "I feel so loved". Amy felt that....and expressed that....and shared that as well in her own way.

I hate death.

But I love Christ.....and His victory over death....and know that He loves me.....and Amy......and those that now continue on.

Just for fun

2007-03-13T12:29:00.000-07:00

Try this illusion - very cool.

(ht to gman)

Small groups vs. Small Service

2007-03-06T04:35:00.000-08:00

Okay, I know it shouldn't be either/or and it should be both/and. But I am getting ahead of my question so let me back up.....

I serve a medium size church as the volunteer 7-12th grade youth guy - trying to discern Jesus' ministry to students in this place and provide the foundational practices, experiences, and relationships that will give their faith legs - so they can continue to grow into the likeness of Jesus until they take their last breath.

Two things have been on my mind lately -

Small groups - a place for students to gather with adult leaders and go a little deeper in discussing their faith, reveal more about who they are and spend time working on being transparent and real with each other....as they ponder aspects of their faith together. The groups would be "stable" as much as possible.

Small service - having an opportunity for 3-5 students go and serve a group of people or charitable organization in our local community (preferably outside of their normal interactions) with 2 adult volunteers 1-2X month. They would most likely be serving together for 2-4 hours. The adults and students wouldn't be the same each week....it would be a "sign-up" type of deal - for both the leaders and students.

Yes, I believe both are good things. But if you had to pick one to start with - which would you choose? What are the questions you would ask to help come to the most wise decision?

I so want one of these....

2007-03-05T19:22:00.000-08:00

Jetting around the sky....how cool is that? Envy consumes me...

Clearing the temple update #2

2007-03-05T10:43:00.000-08:00

Yep - I'm glad to say that I'm still working out and trying to watch what I eat. For a little background you can go here....

I've now lost just a smidge over 30 pounds. My clothes look pretty baggy on me. I'm sleeping better. My longest run has been 8 miles. I'm still generally working out by biking or running 3X/wk and trying to watch my portion size at meals....and cut down on "bad carbs and sugars".

All that being said - a few observations over the last month or so.....

Last week was tough. I just came off the 30 hour famine and I'm not sure if that is what put me totally out of whack or not....but I have been grumpy, moody, physically a little shaky, and generally depressed. The last couple of days...and today in particular are MUCH better and I'm glad that week is behind me.
I've developed cravings for Girl Scout Cookies.....YIKES!
I've never eaten so much broccoli, cucumbers, green beans, lettuce in my life....
My family is so supportive it rocks.
My running time remains a good spiritual "habit" and good conversation with God but I am recognizing that I need the stillness and silent time with God as much....or more.
I really need to put something on the white wall in front of the treadmill - I have memorized every pattern of dots/dirt that are on it....and sometimes I see faces in them. another YIKES! (At least they aren't talking to me...yet)

Again - all in all the adventure of taking better care of my "temple" has resulted in spiritual growth and more quality time with God as the biggest benefit. The fact that I'm physically healthier is really a secondary bonus.

It hasn't been super easy - last week was a real struggle - but persevering through was a "good experience". Thanks to all of you that have been praying me through this adventure!

Now - time to go and buy some new clothes! (Too bad I'm a guy and I really don't have any joy shopping for clothes....)

Feed My Starving Children - at the famine....

2007-02-28T05:31:00.000-08:00

I love the 30 hour famine. It brings so much to one "event". Worship, prayer, service, sacrifice, relationships, understanding, resources - all of it centered around Christ's compassion, grace, mercy, and love for each of us.

Normally we experience the famine at our own church and have about 30 kids participating. This year we combined with 12 other churches and gathered together with about 230 students. The line up included: Worship, conversations in small groups about hunger, prayer stations, Comedy Sportz, videos, Shane Claiborne, packing food for Feed My Starving Children (FMSC), games with hunger themes, games just for fun, collecting food for PROP, raising money for villages in Zambia, sleeping a little and a spaghetti dinner.

After the famine I got to talk to the kids and hear their thoughts - personal reflections on what it was like for them to go without food for 30 hours, how it impacted their understanding of how others live and actions they can take, where they saw Jesus in those moments. We also talked about "the event" and what they thought about the experience being with 200+ youth rather than with our own gathering.

What impressed me most was, that as we talked with our students afterwards, what they "liked best" wasn't the guys from Comedy Sportz (they were hilarious by the way), or the videos (very engaging videos on hunger, 'invisible children', personal visits to villages in Zambia), or the games (intense games of pin guard) but rather:

Shane Claiborne - "He was real! He wasn't just telling us to go and live differently...he was actually doing it himself."

Prayer Stations (we had 18 'experiential' prayer stations for the students to wander through and discover)

Serving - Packing food for FMSC.

It highlighted for me once again that ministry is NOT about entertainment. We can't outprogram the world. And in the context of packing food for Feed My Starving Children it brought to mind what our kids are "starving" for - they demonstrated spiritual cravings that were being satisfied during the 30 hours that they went without food. Cravings for:

serving others (love your neighbor as yourself)

closeness to God (Love God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength)

authentic relationship...seeing what it looks like to live, imperfect as we are, as a disciple.

Yeah....the famine helped to 'feed my (God's) starving children' and hopefully give them a taste of grace that will linger and increase their desire to follow Him.

What's the role of the youth pastor?

2007-02-28T05:21:00.000-08:00

Mark Riddle posted this question on his blog. What are your thoughts?

(I won't put my thoughts here yet, but I did comment on Mark's)

I love my wife...

2007-02-14T13:07:00.000-08:00

because she hides cards like this inside of my laptop for me to find.....and a million other reasons.

February 14th

2007-02-14T12:38:00.000-08:00

Holy
Almighty
Perfect
Perichoresis (surprised I know this one!?)
Yahweh

Victory
Awesome
Love (of course!)
Embracing
Nonlinear
Timeless
Incarnational
Numberless
Everlasting
Savior

Divine
Author
Yea!

Did he get to heaven?

2007-01-10T19:27:00.000-08:00

I had the privilege of teaching at Powerhouse tonight. First time this year I think. Powerhouse is our 7-8th grade youth gathering. (I really dislike the name by the way....but not enough to change it!) It is our most energetic group and unfortunately our most understaffed. Not a great situation - but kids keep coming, kids keep inviting, and I'm trying to patiently wait for the right person or two to be called to work with this age group....but that's not the point of this post. Sorry for the detour.

Tonight we were exploring the passage from Mark 2 where Jesus is teaching inside a home and there was a very large crowd. Four guys carry a paralyzed man to Jesus by climbing up on the roof, making a whole, and lowering him down. Then Jesus speaks the words to the man, "Son, your sins are forgiven." Later the man is physically healed and he gets up and leaves. There is no record of any conversation between the man and Jesus. No record of his reaction more than him getting up and leaving (although the passage in Luke says he was praising God as he left.)

I asked the kids tonight, sort of off the top of my head, "Do you think that man went to heaven? Why or why not?" It lead to a great tension filled discussion with great questions and comments:

"Doesn't he have to ask Jesus into his heart, or say out loud that he believes?"

"Doesn't that fact that he got up show that he believed (and thus believed in) Jesus?"

"If his sins are forgiven, isn't that the start of his journey/faith in Jesus?"

"Was it enough that his friends had faith in Jesus and that saved him?"

Great questions - I was so impressed with our kids and leaders as they really talked about and tried to flesh out what was going on in the story and what they think.

What an amazing evening it was for me.....thanks Jesus.

Oh, by the way, what do you think? Did he get to heaven?

PEAKS & valleys

2007-01-09T14:56:00.000-08:00

Wow. This year has really started off as a roller coaster ride for me. I've had some very high PEAKS and some pretty deep valleys in the past couple of weeks. Here's a glimpse at the journey....

PEAK - Our prayer worship service to start the new year. We put together an opportunity for corporate, individual, and small group prayer into the worship service that was experiential, non-threatening, and inviting. One of the most intimate worship experiences I've had in awhile.

valley - calendar chaos. Between the family calendar and planning for youth events I feel WAY behind and as though I'm slogging through mud to start the year.

PEAK - SMYG this past Sunday morning was a great experience. Did a message on based on the stoning of Stephen. Lots of creative ideas came out of it - involving mirrors and rocks - and the kids/leaders seemed engaged. A good start to SMYG 2007.

valley - house chaos. I can't seem to get ahead on the house "chores" - just your mundane stuff like grocery shopping, laundry, keeping things picked up. And I let this bug me WAY more than I should.

PEAK - my run this past Saturday. I ran 40 minutes and felt great. Also felt very connected with God during that time - and landed on some good ideas for the SMYG lesson the next day.

valley - my daughter, Kate, heads back for college in 6 days. I don't show it enough (or tell her often enough) but I sure miss having her around. I can't imagine what it will be like when Kelsey leaves for college next fall - yikes!

PEAK - I have had some very encouraging comments from kids in our youth group over the past few weeks. Words are powerful tools.

As I process a little it is me striving for control that is frustrating me. That and just not buckling down and getting to work on things I need to persevere through. I guess I better start - and thank God for being present in the PEAKS and valleys of my life.

Clearing the Temple Update

2007-01-04T19:06:00.000-08:00

What an interesting journey. I finally get it, that Jesus really wants me to start taking better care of my body (clearing the temple). A couple weeks later I find out that I have developed diabetes.

It has now been a little over 5 weeks since I've started running/biking and informally watching what I eat. In general I've been doing 30-45 minutes of exercise 3X/wk and cutting back on my portion size at meals. Here are some of my observations:

The first 5-8 minutes of exercising are the worst. It takes me a while to find a groove.

My weight has dropped about 10 pounds.

I have better energy in the afternoons.

My exercise time has become very prayerful. Especially in the "listening" phase of the conversations I have with God.

After about 25 minutes the only prayers I can say are very simple - "Holy Spirit fall on me"; "Dear Lord Jesus, Son of God, have mercy upon me, a sinner", etc.

I enjoy watching sermons while I exercise....and listening to Kelly Clarkson. *sigh*

My family is very supportive of me. My kids even created a homemade exercise journal - complete with inspirational quotes - for me to track my progress.

It has been an amazingly positive experience - not just physically but spiritually. Praise God for blessing this adventure in clearing my temple so that there is more room for Him.

I Love Hugs

2006-12-27T14:27:00.001-08:00

This video reminded me of how much our family is a "hugging" family....and how much I love that! One of the things that my daughter Kate noticed when she went to college was how much she missed getting hugs from Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother - and I missed her hugs as well.

To be embraced by someone that loves you unconditionally - it doesn't get much better than that.

May you feel Jesus' embrace this day and know that His embrace lasts forever.

Pass the mashed potatos

2006-12-26T05:42:00.000-08:00

You can now have "family dinners" via video-link! (Read about it here.)

At first I was put off by this....but as I ponder it I'm intrigued. I know that I treasure the times that our family is all gathered around the table, sharing a meal, and sharing stories. The biggest downside I see is that no one could pass the food "virtually"....at least not yet....and that would leave me to my own cooking!

Have yourself....

2006-12-25T17:00:00.000-08:00

a very merry Christmas! (And thanks for stopping by!)

If you'd like a couple of great "deeper" thoughts for this day.....go here.

God has wrapped himself in human skin.....how cool is that?

Let Loose - Remix

2006-12-20T19:21:00.000-08:00

The following is a post from last December - but it has been on my mind once again and so I am "re-blogging" part of it here.

On one of my fave blog sites here there was a discussion about what word you would choose to meditate on for Christmas......after pondering this I chose the word(s) "let loose". I was reading "The Message" translation of the story of the birth of Jesus and in describing the shepherds in Luke 2:20 it says,"The sheepherders returned and let loose, glorifying and praising God for everything they had heard and seen. "Those words "let loose" have been rolling around in my head ever since with thoughts such as:

God let loose his Son on earth.

I should let loose of things that keep my focus off of Jesus
when was the last time I really let loose in praise and glorifying God.

Jesus let loose of his life and died for me.

The list goes on....

God satisfies - I need to let loose and let Him all the way in so that I can truly grow and become who He wants me to be. That is my prayer this day.....that this Christmas, as I remember Jesus' birth, that I can let loose of those things holding me back from being "birthed" into the man God wants me to be.

"A Worship Service That's Not Inn"

2006-12-19T04:53:00.000-08:00

That was the title of "the lesson" this past Sunday for SMYG (our name for Sunday School at our church - Sunday Morning Youth Gathering). We adapted a worship service from "The book of Uncommon Prayer" by Steve Case - a fabulous resource by the way - that has the kids go outside for a worship experience after they discover there is no room at the Inn.

We had a great time with this - all of our leaders wore name badges as employee's of the "Bethlehem Inn". The leaders played their roles up pretty well. We had locked the youth room up and set up a hotel front outside the door. The innkeeper took names on a waiting list and directed the kids upstairs to the shuttle waiting area. Of course, the shuttle driver called and the shuttle was broken down....so we walked. (Being in MN we were blessed with a perfect day - mid 20's, light wind, sunny and no snow on the ground!) As we were walking one of the kids even said, "The sun is sure bright!" and that of course led to comments about following a bright star!

Our "journey" eventually led us to an area set up outside between a few trees. I had put up two big blue tarps to frame the area. We had a manger and some candles. Once we gathered we had a very cool worship service that included group prayer, an advent celebration, a responsive prayer, bible readings, and then a re-telling of the Christmas story using 4 of Max Lucado's writings.

Then we closed by singing Mercy Me's version of Silent Night.

It was great - to be outside, trying to relate to what it was like for Mary/Joseph when they were turned away from the Inn. The journey they were on and that continued on from there. To ponder what is must have been like to be entrusted with protecting, nurturing, and letting go of God's son.

It was a great way to start the day!

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

2006-12-15T08:01:00.000-08:00

Yup. It was going to be a fine morning. No meetings. Nothing big on the schedule. Good quiet time to think through and prepare the message for our Sunday Morning Youth Gathering (SMYG). And then Alexey says, "Dad, the Christmas tree fell down."

I walked into the "Christmas Tree Room" and saw this.

Of course when I shared this story with Kimpa she had to ask the question: "Did you know it was going to fall down?"

Well...truth be told...over the past couple of days I would look at the tree and think: "Is it leaning a little to the left? Nah....it's just the way the branches look. I'm sure it's fine. It must be my imagination."

Obviously, it wasn't my imagination. *sigh*

Diabetes

2006-12-14T04:49:00.000-08:00

I've just been diagnosed with diabetes.

This creates some interesting ponderings when put into the context of the conversation I had with God about my needing to "Clear The Temple" about a year ago. Maybe if I had followed His leadings back then I could have avoided this diagnosis now.

Anyway - I can only go forward from here. The good news is that I have been consistent with my exercising for the past 3 weeks (and Drew is still checking in with me!). The biggest challenge now will be diet. I've got some reading to do to figure out what the best "diabetic" diet is - what to avoid (sugar/starches?) and what to lean more toward. Luckily, I'm not a huge fan of sweets.

I'm already noticing that my mind is craving some things I shouldn't eat - I think simply because I know I shouldn't eat them, not because it is a food I absolutely adore. I find this interesting as well. Why is it that when we are given so much abundance in our choices we focus on the ones that come with the words "anything but that." Maybe this is how Adam/Eve felt (fell?) in the garden.

So some lifestyle changes are required. Diet and exercise. And maybe better listening skills and follow through when God nudges me.

Of course I'm off to breakfast with friends going to the Original Pancake House this morning! Here is a picture of their famous apple pancake. Lord, give me strength...

Listening in....

2006-12-13T09:19:00.000-08:00

Bits and pieces of conversations i hear around me as I hang out at Bruegger's Bagels....

"I need help!"

"I smelled great!"

"Would you say that is a flat trend, diminishing trend, or something else?"

"The next day they had lights on their porches, too."

"Can I stall?"

"She is so crabby right now. It is hard being around negative people....you get sucked down."

Hmmm. Makes me wonder what God thinks as he listens in on my conversations during the day. The good/bad news is that He hears the whole thing in context - both comforting and scary at the same time!

Regardless - I'm glad He cares enough to listen.....and to speak.

A Christmas Story

2006-12-11T10:32:00.000-08:00

During our weekly small group gathering at our home, we took some time to share our fave childhood Christmas stories. Here's mine.

When I was a kid, our Christmas Eve tradition was to go for a drive and look for Rudolph. Mom, Dad, myself and my two brothers would all pile in the car and drive aimlessly around looking for Rudolph's red nose up in the air. Of course, we spotted him numerous times - my parents seemed to have an especially keen eye for spotting Rudoph. There would be screams of "I see him!" "There he is!" "He must be getting close to our house!" Since Rudoph was obviously cruising the neighborhood we were very excited then to return home and see if Santa had visited yet. Of course, before leaving on our adventure in the car we had left cookies and milk out for Santa and a carrot for Rudolph. Magically, every Christmas Eve, when we returned home from our drive there would be presents under the tree, the milk and cookies would be partially eaten, and a few good nibbles were gone from the carrot!

Well, the brothers and I got tired of always missing Santa so we convinced our parents that we should stay home on Christmas Eve and wait for Santa to arrive. So on Christmas eve, as we were sitting around the dinner table we suddenly heard the sound of reindoor hooves and bells jingling!! My dad says, "Quick, let's go outside and see Santa and his reindeer - they must have just landed!" We go sprinting outside and look up to see......nothing! My Dad yells - "We must have just missed him, I bet he's in the house!" We all go tearing back into the house and my mom is there waiting exclaiming, "Ahh, you just missed him!"

And there were the presents - under the tree!

In a child's mind - it was magical. And was probably the reason I believed in Santa until I was....well....let's just say I hung on for awhile!

Good times.

(For those of you wondering - my dad had rigged a rope that went up through the chimney and attached to some old boots and jingle bells. When my mom had gotten up to get "something from the kitchen" during dinner she yanked it.....and the rest as they say.....is history!)

If you love penguins....

2006-12-11T10:25:00.000-08:00

you might want to skip this game.

Otherwise, my best was 320.5. What's yours?

Warning: This game is addictive and a TOTAL waste of time. Sort of like 24.

Do you have "the word"?

2006-12-07T08:08:00.000-08:00

We were traveling in the car somewhere, my family of five and I, along with Alexey's best friend Peter. I'm driving and most likely pondering the to-do list for the next youth event at church (or NOT!) when from the back seat my son Alexey calls to me, "Hey, Dad!" Being the good dad that I am I respond with, "What?" And with that comes hysterical laughter from two 8 y.o. boys along with screams of "You've got the word!"

"THE WORD" Have you ever played the "You've got the word!" game? The object, at least in the example above, is to get someone in your vicinity to say the word "what" - thus subjecting them to laughter and embarrassment until they can make someone else say the word and thus alleviating this almost unbearable burden of being stuck with "the word".

Did I mention that I hate the word game?

I was thinking about "the word game" as I was teaching last Sunday.

We were looking at the story of Joseph and Mary's encounter with Simeon and Anna at the temple. I was focusing on how all of them had gotten "a word" from God. We talked about the story a bit and then we talked about the words associated with Advent - Hope, Peace, Joy, and Love. We spent some time pondering what each word might mean for us this season. Then we had a time of prayer - lighting the Advent candle and then listening for what "word" God wanted each of us to hear during this season of advent - Hope, Peace, Joy, or Love. I had made some cards with each word on it, a scripture verse and then a prayer that turned that verse into a prayer back to God and encouraged the kids to personalize it as much as possible as they prayed back to God, a prayer based on the word they felt they were being led to.

Maybe there is a word I need to be "stuck" with this season.

Maybe, if I listen a little closer, I will hear God saying, "Hey, Dave!" And I will respond.

Of course, God is hoping we all get stuck with "the word".

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it.

The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:1-5, 14

The loss of "childlike" faith

2006-12-06T19:28:00.000-08:00

Here is an interesting article about how "Tweens are becoming the new Teens". Not earth shattering and certainly something most people working with kids have noted, myself included.
But as I've been pondering what it means to have a childlike faith, this article struck me from a theological perspective....which is rare for me - I'm not a big theological type thinker.

The reasons stated in the article for changes both physical, emotional, and behavioral were related to diet, obesity, and exposure to more "adult" themes at earlier ages - mainly through media. Yeah, I can see that.

But then I think of the many times Jesus spoke of children and faith:

At that time Jesus said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure." Mt 11:25-26

And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me." Mt 18:3-5

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." Mt 19:14

It makes we wonder if one of the reasons "tweens are becoming the new teens" is that they are being exposed to sin at an earlier age than ever before. And as their eyes, ears, brains, senses are "marinated" in culture - they are losing not just their childhood sooner but their childlike faith - and how this must break Jesus' heart in some ways.

It also makes we wonder what my response should be as a "youth guy" - hoping to create an environment to allow childlike faith to blossom, occur, recur, or ???? in our gatherings and in the relationships we strive to form with and among the kids we are entrusted with.

It brings up a lot of other questions in my mind as well. But those I'll ponder in my heart for a while longer before (if?) I share them.

Lap, Dance, Grumpy

2006-12-01T07:22:00.000-08:00

Yeah, maybe that title is a cheap way to get your attention....but it worked didn't it? Stay with me....I might pull it together! (But grab a cup of java first....this is a long one!)

I've been stuck on the phrase "child-like faith" the past couple of days. It has been rolling around in my head. As I've been pondering that phrase and I've been watching how my son, Alexey (8 y.o.) explores the world, I've been struck by a couple of things.

"Lap"

Alexey naturally desires to spend "snuggle" time with mom/dad.

At night, when we put Alexey to bed, he loves it when I lay next to him (or sometimes on him!) and tell him a story, sing a "silly song", or read to him. I've decided it isn't so much about the story, song, or book as much as it is about having something that makes the "snuggle" time last longer. When I am putting Alexey to bed we'll snuggle and do a story/song, then I get up and get him a drink of water. That is usually when he says, "I wish Mom was putting me to bed. She will lay down with me after I drink my water." Alexey can't get enough snuggle time.

Alexey is also in the habit of seeking me out in the morning after he wakes up (he usually finds me typing random thoughts on the computer!) and will ask, "Can we sit on the couch?" And we will go and I will hold him on my lap and we'll just sit....Alexey resting on my lap and snuggling in. Not saying a lot. Just enjoying each other's presence.

As he is getting older these times of snuggling and sitting on my lap are gradually decreasing. Some would say this is "natural". Yeah, maybe. Maybe the natural way of the world. But is it right?

The sad part is, as I reflect on this, the decrease in time spent "resting together" is not because of changes in Alexey's wants/needs as much as it is about changes in me. Being too stressed out and/or busy - worrying more about getting Alexey to bed so I can finish watching a TV show, or read a book, or prepare for youth group - than honoring his desire for "snuggling" - resting with me. Same thing in the mornings. More and more often I'm busy on the computer, doing some laundry, writing my list of things to get done for the day - instead of welcoming Alexey onto my lap to just sit and rest in each other's presence.

Am I training my son to lose this desire to spend time with his Father? Was I trained that way?
Is that why I struggle with spending time with God? Is that why it so often seems to be a discipline rather than a desire? Am I trying to reclaim a desire that was trained out of me? I don't want to be the one that takes away my son's childlike faith. I want to be the one that nurtures it. I want him to always have the desire to rest in his Father's presence - to rest with God, enjoying each other's presence.

For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room, and said, "I'm telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you're not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God's kingdom. What's more, when you receive the childlike on my account, it's the same as receiving me. Matthew 18:2-5

"Dance"

A couple of days ago, Alexey was dancing around the living room (which he is prone to do!) as he listened to a Mercy Me CD. He was jumping, moving, twisting with his hands in the air. As he was dancing he started to take off his shirt. When I asked him what he was doing he said, "I was going to take off my shirt and then jump into the crowd! That's what rock stars do!" Complete, childlike abandon. How cool. How unlike myself - me wondering if people are staring as I raise my hands in praise - and definitely not thinking that my clothes are getting in the way of worship - but maybe they are? Hmmm.......

Our family is going to the Michael W. Smith Christmas concert this weekend and as Alexey and I were talking about it he said, "Michael W. Smith won't be taking off his shirt and jumping into the crowd." Wow. Somehow, he has already "framed" his thoughts about how to "behave" during various concerts. Why don't I praise with the abandon that is demonstrated by kids/youth as a rock concert? What am I training my child up to learn? Am I nurturing his spiritual growth or stifling it? Lord, I need your help.

When the religious leaders saw the outrageous things he was doing, and heard all the children running and shouting through the Temple, "Hosanna to David's Son!" they were up in arms and took him to task. "Do you hear what these children are saying?"
Jesus said, "Yes, I hear them. And haven't you read in God's Word, 'From the mouths of children and babies I'll furnish a place of praise'?" Matthew 21:15-16

"Grumpy"

The other night I was exuding all of the bad characteristics that I just mentioned. Now, I don't get grumpy often (my wife claims I only lose it about 4 times a year!) - but the other night everything was bugging me. I was feeling sorry for myself because the house was a mess and I didn't think the family was helping enough to pick stuff up. Alexey was irritating me because he kept randomly breaking out into song/dance while we were playing a game. It was a great pity party. And of course, my mood ended up making everyone uncomfortable. It was horrible. And it was my fault. I couldn't get to the place wher I could enjoy playing a game with my family, watching my child dance and sing just for fun, because I was focused on myself. I was about as far from a child-like faith as I could get. Shame on me. God forgive me - and I hope my family does as well.

People brought babies to Jesus, hoping he might touch them. When the disciples saw it, they shooed them off. Jesus called them back. "Let these children alone. Don't get between them and me. These children are the kingdom's pride and joy. Mark this: Unless you accept God's kingdom in the simplicity of a child, you'll never get in." Luke 18:15-17

Helping me clear the temple - thanks, Drew!

2006-11-30T09:12:00.000-08:00

I used to love running. I think I liked the mental aspect of it more than the physical. I'm generally a pretty laid back guy......but back in H.S. I used to try to destroy other runners on the track.

Now I'm old.

Running doesn't have much appeal anymore.

But I'm also gaining girth. That doesn't have much appeal to me either.

It was some time ago (like a few months) when I was "pondering" the various passages where Jesus clears the temple. At that time I felt God nudging me to start clearing the temple he has given me to live in....my body. Clearing it of not just evil desires and thoughts - but of how badly I treat it.

That thought recently returned to me again - sort of like "HELLO, didn't you hear me the first time. I'm not kidding about this! Clear the temple!"

So I've started running.

But to keep doing it I'm going to need an accountability partner. So I've asked my son Drew to ask me every day if I ran or not.

I didn't think he actually would....but he has been. And it has made me keep on track so far. (Okay, I'm only into my first week but I've run twice so far and that has been because Drew has asked me if I have.)

And a child will lead them.....

Thanks Drew. I appreciate it more than you know. And I know you read this sometimes so as long as I'm being mushy and all....I love you!

Now how about that Bears / Vikings game this weekend. Go Bears! (Does anybody have a QB we can borrow?)

Nose Hair Trimmers

2006-11-28T11:17:00.000-08:00

Is it a bad sign that, not only do I own a nose hair trimmer, but that I had to change the battery in it today? Man, am I old.....

I'm a blog idiot!

2006-11-28T10:54:00.000-08:00

Okay, I just "converted" my blog to the new "beta" format. Not even sure what that means but since it is new it has to be better, right?

In the process, I saw that I had "21 unmoderated" comments. What?! Comments?

I didn't realize that I had to "moderate" the comments. Didn't even know I had some. Nice to see - but I'm sure those that did comment are wondering what was so objectionable in their comments that they weren't published! Ummm....nothing - clearly operator error!

I'm a blog idiot - welcome to my world!

(And thanks to all of those that did comment! I appreciate it!) *sigh*

Where I've been....

2006-11-28T08:40:00.000-08:00

I had the one person who reads my blog ask me if I was ever going to update it again! While it has been nice not putting pressure on myself to put my thoughts here....I have also missed it. So I'm jumping back in. Here is where I've been the last couple of months....

Hangin' with our fabulous youth at Lake Beauty for the "Revolutionary Rabbi Encounter '06"
Taking 15 or so eight y.o.'s to Sever's Corn Maze for Alexey's Birthday party
Relishing time with my daughter Katie as she came home for a week before returning to CO to work at the 4UR Ranch until Christmas
Having a "coffee date" with my wife to discuss what charities to support and just to gaze into each others eyes for awhile
Watching my daughter Kelsey and the EP soccer team play for the State Championship
Watching the EP Band in competition at the Metrodome
Celebrating my good friend Lois' 40th Birthday
Attending my son Drew's band c0ncert
Taking a group of 7 youth leaders to a training event at Bethel University
Taking the big Thanksgiving tour to see family - 6 hours in a plane, 14 hours in a car, 3 states, 3 family visits, 4 homes all in just 6 days! (It was fabulous...really...I'm not kidding!)

Lots of places. Lots of relationship building. Lots of fun.

Life is good.....and God runs through it!

Ya gotta love Minnesota!

2006-10-11T07:17:00.000-07:00

It's October 11th.

Just 2 days until we leave for our Sr. High Fall Retreat (now renamed "Revolutionary Rabbi Encounter - Fall '06).

Lots of outdoor activities are planned. High ropes activities, bonfires, ultimate, evening worship around a campfire.

Of course it's snowing today with a high temp around 38 degrees.

Ya gotta love Minnesota!

(Or maybe it's God reminding me that He is in control - regardless of MY plan!)

"What you win them with is what you win them to"

2006-10-06T13:44:00.000-07:00

The above quote is from Greg Fess on his blog which you can find here. Stop reading this and go there and read his post about youth ministry. Go now....I'll wait.

I stumbled upon Greg's thoughts from Marko's post asking the question - "What will youth ministry look like in 50 years?" (You should also go to Marko's post and follow the links to the other writers. It is some amazing stuff. Convicting and encouraging thoughts. I love that!)

Anyway - I love that quote - "What you win them with is what you win them to!"

It has been especially striking for me this week. I have had some conversations with our students as well as some parents about concerns they have about our Jr. High gathering - various things from not enough game/fun time to not connecting with the leaders and/or not feeling like they are growing. I've also had students and parents share the opposite - excited that their students feel like they can invite friends, excited about what they are experiencing and learning, making it a priority in their week.

As a ministry team we try to make all of our gatherings contain these three characteristic (there are many more but these are our top three right now) - Christ-centered, passionate, relational.

Because there isn't a "typical" teenager I don't imagine we will ever find a mix that engages all the kids every week. That is why our ministry has to look beyond our programs. It isn't about our programs -it is about finding ways to engage kids with maturing adults to help them grow in their relationship with Christ so that when all of the games, messages, worship, small groups, mission trips, lock-ins and their time in our youth ministry is over - they have a faith that will last, persevere, and meet the challenges of their journey ahead. And we need to be a church that will embrace and nurture them - regardless of whether they show up on Wednesday, Sunday, after they graduate, after they have made a huge mistake, after, after, after....again, and again, and again.

As I think about the comments I have heard this week and I ponder our gatherings and the impact I hope they have it makes me wonder......what are we winning our students with...and therefore...what are we winning our students to?

I also remember that God is working through our imperfection. That ultimately His Spirit will be the force behind our student's faith....and we are a leaky, imperfect, dinged up conduit....and what a cool place that is for me to be - and there isn't anywhere else I'd rather be. Praise, God.

Kayaking - the perfect sport for introverts!

2006-10-04T04:55:00.000-07:00

A few years ago my wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday. For some reason my mouth said that I wanted a kayak! Of course, you can't really buy a kayak for someone else so I had some fun learning about and eventually buying a kayak.

It has been been way more fun than I ever could have imagined. It is the perfect "sport" for me. You see, I love to fish. I'm also an introvert at heart.

The best part about the kayak - it only has one seat!

Yep, when I'm kayaking I can only take me. Maybe that sounds selfish - but in a family of 6 and all the related schedules - being able to get away in the kayak and fish for a couple of hours is very restorative. Being out on the water, hangin' with God, catching the occasional fish - very nice.

Thanks, Kimpa, for letting me "splurge" on my birthday - and understanding me so well!

Diet Coke, Mentos, the Holy Spirit and kids

2006-10-02T09:27:00.000-07:00

Okay, I know I'm behind the "cool" curve - maybe a lot behind. I just found out about the Diet Coke and mentos phenom. That when you drop a few mentos into a 2 liter of Diet Coke a pop geyser ensues. I love that. Of course, I had to work it into our SMYG lesson this Sunday!

I had already planned on taking the gathering outside. There aren't too many 75 degree days this time of year in MN! We are studying the book of Acts and the key verses were:

But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth. Acts 1:8

Jesus answered, "I tell you the truth, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless he is born of water and the Spirit. Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, 'You must be born again.' The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit." John 3:5-8

As we talked about the power of the Holy Spirit coming upon the disciples I made the comparison of the kids being the Diet Coke and the Holy Spirit being the mentos - and when the Holy Spirit (mentos) dwells within them (Diet Coke) transformation and power occurs.

As we further talked about the Holy Spirit we all sat still, closed our eyes and felt for the wind outside. God provided a nice breeze - one that the kids noticed varied in speed, direction, and strength. Some noted that it seemed to surround them. Others noted that it provided comfort on this warm morning. We then talked about how that might relate to our understanding of the Holy Spirit - it was a great conversation.

Then we finished with a time of prayer - of who we are called to witness to in our relational circles - from family/friends, to community, to regionally, to globally. Then we just sat still and let the Holy Spirit "blow" over us.

I don't know what the kids will walk away with from today. I'm sure some will just think it was fun being outside and watching stuff blow up. But my prayer is that others will enter this week with a new/evolving understanding of the Holy Spirit in their lives - and that it is the same spirit that was active in the lives of the apostles.

Homecoming - then and now....

2006-09-29T05:33:00.000-07:00

Homecoming. Just the word brings back awkward memories from my High School days. All those horrible questions that seemed to be asked on a daily basis:

"Are you going?" "Who are you going with?" "Do you know if ________ is going?" "Who are they going with?" "Are you going as friends or do you actually like each other?" "Has anyone asked you to Homecoming?" "You are going aren't you?" "If you go, do you want to double?"
"If I ask _______ do you think they'll say yes?" "Did you get her flowers yet?" "Bouquet or corsage?" "Do you know how to tie a tie?" "Are we going out to eat somewhere?" "Are you going?"

Admittedly, I was a pretty awkward H.S. kid looking for a place to fit in. Lots of stories to share there but that will be for another time (maybe).

This week I have been able to see Homecoming from a different perspective. My daughter, Kelsey, was voted onto the Homecoming court. I have had the privilege of supporting her - in my limited and awkward Dad knowledge of such things - this week. It has been way cool to see her friends get excited about dresses, hairstyles, make-up, shoes.....and show up at our house to help my daughter get ready for the events of the week. How fun. What a great community of friends she has. Good times.

And I am the luckiest guy in the world - having been able to escort two of the most beautiful women (on the inside and the outside) I know during Homecoming week.....then and now.

Good Monsters

2006-09-28T10:53:00.000-07:00

I just picked up the Jars of Clay "Good Monsters" CD yesterday. When I first heard it.....I thought it was okay. The musical "style" isn't really one that captures my attention. Then I opened up the
CD and started reading the words to "Work" - the first cut on the CD.

The line that jumped out at me was:

I have no fear of drowning
It's the breathing that's taking all this work.

I don't know why but as soon as I read that line I had to sit down.....and I started to cry. Wow. Not sure if it is a personal sadness or the sadness that a friend is experiencing or the sadness I see in kids sometimes that caused this reaction. That will be one for me to ponder.....

As I read that rest of the song lyrics I was moved by their depth and emotion. An amazing effort by a band that refuses to just copy what they have done in the past. Kudos to you, Jars of Clay!

Off to a good start

2006-09-27T05:17:00.000-07:00

Our youth ministry "program" year is off to a good start. We have lots of fabulous volunteers surrounding and nurturing our Jr High and Sr. High students.

We are about 3 weeks into the beginning of our gatherings. It is cool how some of the theme's for all that is going on are converging without having planned it.

One of our goals for this year is to try to create opportunities for more interaction between the students and the congregation at large - with the hope being that we can surround each student in our church (whether they attend our "programs" or not) with three maturing Christian adults outside of their family that they would feel comfortable sharing a joy, concern, or question about faith with.

One way we are trying to measure this is by simply our students that question: Can you name up to three adults in our congregation that you would feel comfortable sharing a joy, concern, or question about faith with?

We are asking that now, at the beginning of the year, and will ask this again at the end of the year. Very non-scientific and imperfect I know. But it will be interesting to see if/how their answers change over the course of the year and if our/their relationship web is expanding or contracting. (It will also help us identify adults that are already forming good relationships with our students and possibly invite them to join our ministry team in the future!)

Then the challenge is to put that into the mix in looking at our ministry - are those relationships going to help keep our kids growing and engaged in becoming disciples even after they leave our gatherings? Will require some long term tracking....and praying.

God has so blessed us with volunteers and students that are already growing in community. I feel a burden to nurture this gift that God has given us. As you read this - if you feel lead to pray for me, our students, and/or our volunteers - please take a moment now to do so. I appreciate it more than you know.

Just the facts please, m'am!

2006-09-26T07:18:00.000-07:00

Okay, so my wife has been complaining about our phone not working so well lately. Sometimes when you press a button it won't register or it will repeat it. Yeah, a little incovenient but not that big of a deal.

Unless you are dialing a number that starts with 91.

And the phone chooses to repeat the 1.

And you don't notice that you have just dialed 911.

You do notice when the policeman shows up at your door asking if everything is okay. And then another squad car pulls up because they always send two cars for an incomplete 911 call.

Guess I better make time to get a new phone.....

Gettin' my groove on....sort of....

2006-09-20T07:46:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks have been a whirlwind of prep and planning. From the start of the youth ministry program year to traveling back to IL to bless my friend Thornton to helping with our church's 150th anniversary celebration. There has been little time to look at big picture things and I have been falling behind on the "taking care of the house" list as well.

This week I've had the chance to be home - preparing for SMYG (Sunday Morning Youth Gathering) - and I can feel a rhythm starting to return. Spending time with Jesus, reading a little, working around the house a little, meeting friends.....

I'm not there yet - but I can see a rhythm forming in the near future that is going to be good for me......if I can be disciplined enough to stay in tune with God's spirit each moment of each day. Or at least be willing to keep an ear out for Him.....

Thanks Thornton

2006-09-19T07:42:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago I had the privilege of returning to my church family in Illinois and be part of a celebration of the 10 yr. anniversary of the life and ministry of my buddy Thornton (He is the good looking guy in the middle!) at Chatham Presbyterian Church. It was a surprise party during worship - recognizing the cool things that God has done thru this man.

Thornton was the first Christian man to really invest time into me.....and disciple me. It was a very interesting ride and one that I am forever grateful for. Here are some of the thoughts that I shared with Thornton in reflecting on the adventure we had together.....

A few words and phrases that come to mind when I think of you (and I think of you often):

Change-agent: You are one who will challenge “tradition” and always seem to have your Holy Spirit radar up for when God is doing a new thing – not just in programs….but also in people.

Joyful exuberance – You bring that contagious quality of joy into all of the situations you find yourself in…..and people notice.

Authentic – Being joyful doesn’t mean being happy all the time. You are transparent in your walk with Christ….sharing your struggles, failures, successes, and questions. I love that!

Creative extravagance – We so often had conversations where I was trying for simple and you were trying for “over the top”! From ideas for “Hot air balloon rides” at the Gathering, to hanging the Moravian star over the sanctuary (with electricity!), to gathering of musicians for plays/musicals you keep looking over the edge to see what else can be done. Thanks for not letting me “settle” for less than what God wanted as we ministered together in this place.

Integrity – You have it. I see it. Thanks for sharing it.

Unquenchable passion for seeing lives changed thru the love, grace, and power of Jesus.

You are so filled with passion for Christ that it leaks and oozes out of all that you do…..and all of the relationships that you invest yourself in. Because of our friendship and God’s work in you and through you, I have become a better husband, father, and friend. You have been a blessing beyond measure in my life. I thank God for you.

I ran into this scripture while “pondering” you (is that weird…that I pondered you?):

Live a lover’s life, circumspect and exemplary, a life Jesus will be proud of: bountiful in fruits from the soul, making Jesus Christ attractive to all, getting everyone involved in the glory and praise of God. Philippians 1:10-11 (Msg)

A fitting description of the life and ministry of Thornton Woerner at Chatham Presbyterian Church.

It was a great day. Thanks, Thornton!

Nobody's home....

2006-09-13T07:24:00.000-07:00

I tried calling about 21 Jr. High kids last night between 6:45 and 7:00. I wanted to make a personal invitation to our mid-week youth gathering. Out of the 21 phone calls I made...only 4 families were home.

It made me wonder where they are.

My hope would be that they were out having dinner as a family, or playing at the park, or riding their bikes, or hanging out with friends. My fear is that it is just another night of soccer, gymnastics, dance, tennis, piano, ????. My fear is that it isn't just that Tuesday night is busy and scheduled.....but rather every night is like this.

Of course none of those activities are "bad". My concern is that the activities never let up - there is no "free choice" time to decompress. And it wasn't just the kids that were missing from their homes....it was the parents as well. Yeah, I have a tendency to be a little cynical in this area....but still....75% of the houses I called last night were empty.

What does this mean in persepective to a mid-week youth gathering? Are we just piling on to their already overbooked lives? Are we adding value? Or are we just adding stress? Are we forcing a good choice about priorities and doing battle with the culture.....or are we just helping our kids slowly become exhausted. Are we creating space for Jesus to provide the new, abundant life they need........or making it out to be just another "activity" to be conquered?

Nobody's home.....that worries me.

Perseverance, character, and hope

2006-09-08T07:22:00.000-07:00

My daughter, Kelsey, continues to astound me. (Actually, all of my kids do....but today my thoughts are focused on Kels.)

When I think of her so many positives come to mind. But three in particular are perseverance, character, and hope.

Kels is a senior this year and recently tried out for the H.S. soccer team. She was placed on the JV team - the only Senior on that squad. After pondering that for a day or two she chose to accept that position. She didn't whine or complain. She decided to play.

I am so glad because I love to watch her play (although I don't think the parents of her opponents take as much joy in it!). She really loves the game for the joy of playing. Her character shined through in accepting that position and continuing to play with joy and abandon.

We talked about it and also thought that there was hope she would be asked to play up with the varsity squad at some point as well. (The girls varsity soccer team won the state championship last year and returned all but one from that squad.)

Well....it happened. Kels has been invited to play with the varsity team this weekend at a tournament. Way cool. Way to let your perseverance and character shine through....and living a life of hope - not just for a chance to play soccer, but for the hope that I know lives in your heart because of Christ. Way to go, Kels.

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:3-5

A not so great start

2006-09-07T07:37:00.000-07:00

Wake up. Make coffee. Pour cream into favorite Starbucks Christmas mug. Add coffee. Seal mug. Drink coffee. Open mug to add more coffee. See small white chunks floating in coffee. Become slightly disconcerted. Smell cream. It reeks. Dump coffee. Dump cream. Try not to gag.

Welcome to Thursday. Have a great day.

And so it begins....

2006-09-07T05:19:00.000-07:00

My kids started back to school this week. Being a stay at home dad this has opened up some "space" in my day. Hopefully, I'll use that time wisely but that post is for another day.

As I watch my kids return to school and see/hear about all the stuff they have to deal with....the more I am in awe of them. And, the more convicted I feel as a dad. What are we as a society/culture and specifically me as their dad allowing to happen to them.

Schedule for a 14 y.o.

6:30 a.m. - Wake up at 6:30 - shower, prep, eat bkfst, talk to dad about when/where the drop off and pick ups need to be made for the evening.
7:30 Ride to school with Sr. sister (what a blessing that is!)
8 - 2:45 School - no open hours......and ALL those numbers to remember (locker number, locker combination, sports locker number, sports locker combination, student number, lunch pin code number, room numbers.......I would never make it in H.S. these days!)
3-5:00 Soccer practice (If there is a game that night, Drew won't be home before 6)
5:00 - 6:30 Actually talk to dad about his day, plan for the rest of the night, eat dinner (probably not as a family except 1-2X/wk during the school year)
6:30-7 practice french horn
7-9:30 homework
9:30 "Free time"
10 - off to bed and read for awhile......sleep for 8 hours.....hopefully....
Repeat until exhausted

This would be the "light" schedule. If Drew has a band concert, band lesson, soccer game, church activity (Youth group on Wedndesdays), etc it really bogs down. Basically, the "base" schedule has almost zero flexibility - and little to no time to develop deep relationships with peers or adults that I would like to have in his life......me included.

How do we stop this train now that it has left the station? How will I let this realization impact my decisions/priorities as a dad - and our priorities as a family? How does this impact how we look at youth ministry and the additional pressures that adds to kid's schedules?

I get tired just watching Drew manage his day. And Kelsey's (Senior) and Alexey's (2nd grade) are not that much different.

This has got to change. And I need God to help show me the way - and then for the Holy Spirit to provide the courage to act.

Simple blessings

2006-09-06T13:39:00.000-07:00

I was cleaning the youth room today at church - trying to prepare for the start of our Sunday School and youth program year. Yeah, I was being sort of grumpy about it....and trying really hard to feel sorry for myself.

As I was pulling out really old books and VHS tapes I found a sealed envelope. Of course, nosey noot that I am I opened it. Written inside on a piece of paper was "Jesus loves you!"

A simple blessing. One that I needed. Left by someone long ago by accident - only to be used in a very cool way on this day. Thanks God!

7 y.o. conversations

2006-09-04T18:38:00.000-07:00

"Hey Alexey - I saw that you took your hockey stick down to Sam's house. Did you play hockey?"

"No."

"Did you take it because you thought you might play hockey?"

"No."

"Why did you take the hockey stick?"

"It looks like a gun!"

*sigh*

Fashion statement

2006-09-04T18:34:00.001-07:00

Last Sunday I had the chance to meet a new family. Welcomed them to our church and chatted for a minute. Also had the opportunity to speak with a few friends and be generally social. Was feeling pretty good about it until......

My daughter came up to me, hugged me, and whispered in my ear, "Dad, your shirt is on inside out!"

*Blush*

Yeah, that's right. I'm cool.....

Fashion statement

2006-09-04T18:34:00.000-07:00

Precious Moments

2006-09-01T05:31:00.000-07:00

Nope, I'm not talking about these "cute" little figurines.....and if I ever buy one just shoot me. The precious moments I'm talking about usually happen in the morning - anywhere from 7-8 a.m.

That is the time that my son Alexey wakes up and comes wandering downstairs.

Almost every morning, after he gets out of bed, he wanders downstairs and sits on my lap. Sometimes it is in the computer room (he did it just now as I'm typing this!), sometimes in the living room on the couch, sometimes in the kitchen....but he always finds me.....and plops onto my lap. Then we just sit quietly for a few minutes. Alexey will rub his legs on mine, yawn, stretch, reach up to my face and touch my cheek, give me a kiss, and just sit.......nestled in. Soon he will ask, "Can you play a game with me?" and the day's activities begin.

Those moments - before the day's activities begin - are so precious. It is so cool to start the day with your child resting on you. Listening to his breathing, noticing the scent of his hair, watching him snuggle in as deep as he can, wrapping him in my arms, noticing how he tries to use my arms and legs as a blanket to keep him warm.

Precious moments. Moments I'm not sure he will remember when he gets older. Moments I'm not sure will last much longer.

I wonder if God feels the same way when we nestle into Him. When we slow down enough to just sit and be in His presence. Not saying anything....just breathing, seeking His warmth and comfort, allowing Him to wrap His arms around us...and snuggling in as deep as we can before the day's activities begin.

I have a feeling God perceives those as precious moments - even though there will come a time when I don't remember those moments. And I don't know how much longer those moments will occur.....but they are precious moments none the less.

Perception does not equal impact

2006-08-29T05:41:00.000-07:00

(The following reflection is from my experience as a youth leader three years ago with a young man I will call "John".)

I couldn't figure out why John came to youth group. He was one of the "quirkiest" kids I'd ever met. He was constantly plugged into his music and he hardly ever took his headphones off. He had this thing about being touched - wouldn't shake hands or hold hands during prayer. He didn't participate in small groups or games much.....didn't say very much. Why did he keep coming? I couldn't figure it out.

Then one night he told me. I can't remember the circumstances but his statement haunts me.

"This is the only place that I feel anything."

There was so much pain in those words. To this day it makes me cry just thinking about it. (Yeah, even as I type this.) Those words hit me like a sledge hammer.

I never had a chance to really get to know John. To know where those words came from and why they carried such pain. John was a senior and he drifted away.....and I let him. Shame on me.

But God didn't leave John alone on the journey.

This past Sunday, John showed up at church. He came up to me and I recognized him and knew his name immediately...which is unusual for me. I greeted him by name - and his face started to beam! "I can't believe you remember my name!" he exclaimed. He shook my hand.....that in itself was a sign of transformation. We had a brief conversation. John shared that he was in college, doing well, meeting people. He had brought a friend with him that shared that John had been telling her what a great youth group we had here! He was looking me in the eye, sharing a little about himself, smiling........a completely different person than the one I met three years ago.

I still know very little of John's story. But I know this........

My perception of a student's experience can be WAY off - in good/bad directions.

The Holy Spirit is at work.........my job is to keep inviting, engaging, encouraging, praying.....

Knowing a student by name and remebering them is HUGE.

Providing a safe place to hear about God, know God, believe God, question God and feel God is important.

Dear Lord.....thank you for John. Thank you for remaining with him, pursuing him, engaging him. Thank you for the privilege of being part of his journey. May he continue to grow in his understanding of you..........and continue to feel and experience you in new ways. Amen.

God, mashed potatoes, jello, and dancing colors

2006-08-18T04:20:00.000-07:00

We had a youth ministry team meeting last night. It was a great meeting. Lots of.... what if we try this; wouldn't it be cool if we could.....

I left the meeting with a cool milieu of creative ideas, God, praise, thankfulness, hope, Jesus, names of students and volunteers, and the Holy Spirit all resting on my heart and head.

Later that evening, as I was driving to pick my son up from a party, the song "Blessed Be Your Name" came on the radio. And I started singing along. Aand it felt great. And I started to sing with abandon. And thoughts like, "God is SO cool. Keep your hands on the wheel. God, you are so awesome. Keep your hands on the wheel." And then the next thought/picture that flickered through my brain was "God digs this....he is smiling and dancing as I am singing His praises!"

And then I thought - "Why doesn't worship feel like this when I'm gathered with my church family? What's different?"

And one of the first things that came to mind is mashed potatoes.

When I'm worshipping God - too often the picture I have in my head is like a pile of mashed potatoes. White, fluffy (if their made right with real butter and milk!), comforting, warm......and static. They just sit there. (Go ahead - try singing to a pile of mashed potatoes - I'll wait.) Mashed potatoes are safe, comforting.....and lifeless. So many times as I'm singing, praying, worshiping my focus is sadly on me - silly stuff really - like "Should I be clapping? Should I raise my hands on this verse? Should I stand up? What if I'm the only one standing? Does the guy in front of me think my singing is bad (actually I'm usually in the front row so as to avoid this situation!)?" Of course this picture isn't only around when I worship....but as I live each moment of the day (after all isn't worship really how we live?) *sigh*

And then my thoughts turned to Jell-O.

Yeah, I started to picture God as Jell-O as I worship. Vibrant colors, able to assume various shapes, sweet and tasty, easy to swallow, and jiggly. Still very safe but a little responsive - it will react to my singing with some amount of vibration. (Go ahead, get out some jello and start singing to it. If you get loud enough it will jiggle for you. I'll wait.) Sometimes God is like this in my mind. I've watered him down where he is easy to swallow. Safe, sweet, and tasty - yep, that's the God for me. That's a God that will fit very nicely with the safe life I find myself in - and it's sort of cool when He vibrates like that.....*sheesh*

And then my thoughts turned to dancing colors.

Amazing dancing colors. With depth, complexity, and rhythm. Colors that grab my attention. Colors that when I try to focus on just one it becomes fuzzy and difficult to pin down - but when I just let them flow over me are beautiful and engaging. Colors that respond and yet somehow also lead. As I sing - they dance in amazing ways. Colors that mysteriously become entwined in my very being and cause me to dance and sing in a new way, a unique way, in a way I was meant to. Colors that dance and lead in a way that I know is good....but not safe. Colors that help lead me to see those same colors in all that is around me. Colors that flow around me, in me, and through me. Colors that cover me and leave their mark on me....and in me.....and grow.

So, I've had a reality check...or maybe a truer glimpse of what is real. A change in perspective, perhaps.

I believe those colors that I started seeing last night lead me to read these words this morning...

"So if you're serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don't shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that's where the action is. See things from his perspective. (Col 3:1-2)

.........And sing, sing your hearts out to God!" (Col 3:16)

Just keep swimming

2006-08-15T08:09:00.000-07:00

This time of year is always seems to involve worry and hand wringing for those involved in student ministries (all ministries?). Typically the stress revolves around:

* Volunteer staffing needs for core programs
* Ministry Fairs that introuce the programs to students/parents
* Getting students excited about coming to "programs" in the midst of school starting and
all that it entails
* Equipping leaders, curriculum, communicating with parents/students,

The list goes on and on.....

Of course, looking back over the past 5 years or so and my growing involvement with ministries at EPPC - God ALWAYS provides and/or guides. Why do I worry? My job is to keep showing up, keep walking forward, keep listening to the Holy Spirit and ACT when moved to......and God's blessings pour out in abundance.

I've had some amazing conversations this past week with individuals that have lead to cool possiblities for "youth stuff" this coming year.

God has got it under control........

"If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don't fuss about what's on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.

Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.

If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.

Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes. " (Matthew 25-34)